my husband is kind of an einstein sometimes

here's a conversation we had today

he's real smart.  but sometimes you just gotta explain things to him. 

and then, as you can see, he's a real quick learner.

a three picture preview

that's all for now ;-)

let the party begin!

happy friday!!!  (because i know none of you are reading this in real time... which is thursday night)

mom and dad arrived tonight.  i forgot how hilarious dad is with babies!  baby and i are going to join them for breakfast at the hotel tomorrow morning.  the party starts early!

honey's grandparents get in around noon.  and the rest of his family comes at four.

sorry for the boring post.

sad news for today: honey lost feeling in his middle finger.  he showed me when he got home and we laughed when he flicked me off.  whoops.  anyways, if you're friends with him on facebook, give him some sympathy.  ;-) 

and tell him his wife adores him.  maybe he'll like that.

we broke the rules

i had so much fun with baby girl today.  yesterday was not as fun because i swear she was only awake for about four hours of it.  how do babies sleep so much?!?!  awake one hour, sleep for at least three.  repeat.

but today was more fun.  the first part of the day was the awake/sleep routine.... or you could call it the 1/3.  but tonight we got a little off the beaten path.

baby ate a 6.  down in crib at 7.  perfect.  she would wake up at 10, eat, and then we would leave to get honey from the airport.

didn't happen though.  baby woke up at 8.  hadn't fallen back asleep by 8:15 so i got her out.  i couldn't figure out what the problem was.  she hung out with me and watched me fold laundry.  when her contentment faded i considered that she might be hungry.  fed her at 8:45.  well that was definitely the problem.  she ate like it was going to be her last meal... ever.  i tried putting her back to bed, but it was too hot.  remember what happens when it's too hot?  so that didn't work.  so she came downstairs with me to hang out while i ate (not a meal... just eating to eat) and read.

at some point she seemed fussy again so i laid down on the sofa and fed her.  she ate some and fell asleep... sleep ate, and then just slept.  I STAYED THERE AND LET HER SLEEP NEXT TO ME.  i have never done this before!!!  call me boring and anal but i've been really by the books on putting baby to sleep in her crib... awake.  i. don't. part. from. this.

but there was no going upstairs for us.  and i really didn't want to get off the sofa.  and i was going to have to get her up to put her in her carseat in 30 minutes anyways.  and she would have just woken up and gotten fussy from the heat and sleep deprivation.  and she looked so cute cuddled next to me.  and it was nighttime and i wanted her company.

so i let her stay.

and it felt good.

you know the good that comes from breaking the rules?

it's the same good i feel right now at 12:33 am as i continue to eat more than a half of a pan of brownies in one sitting...

that kind of good.

baby's birth story

okay, i wrote this about a month ago and have tweaked it ever since and i'm still not happy with it but i'm gonna give up and say i guess this is just as good as it's gonna get.  ENJOY!

_________________________________

well, i was due friday, july 9th... which came and went without a baby.  i was okay with that though, because i liked being pregnant.  and i had planned on going at least a week over.  i figured it was just a normal first time thing y'know?  sadly, chris and mom were not at all okay with going late!

we knew it was getting closer though because i could totally feel my body changing and getting ready for labor.  it was weird because it just felt so obvious. 

well we all kept really busy (and active!).  we hiked the dish (very hilly 3.5 mile loop) a few times, toured filoli house and gardens, and shopped like crazy.  late afternoon on wednesday, mom and i were planting flowers on the patio (well, i was actually sitting in a chair directing mom how i wanted the flowers to look while she dug in the dirt on her hands and knees... my mother is a saint, more on that later) when i felt a couple of stronger than normal contractions.

mother was instantly on guard and wanted me to start timing them but i told her to calm her horses and not get her hopes up.  well, after a couple more of those, and after we finished planting flowers, we decided maybe it would be a good idea to go inside (around 6:00) and start timing them.  i started writing them down on a piece of paper and was surprised to see that they were all less than five minutes apart, like 2-4 minutes mostly.  i was still timing them when chris got home from work (fyi i was super disappointed he hadn't texted me to ask if i was having labor pains... since he had done that a million times before) at 6:30 or 7 or so and since dinner was already in the oven, we decided to eat and then head to the hospital. 

when chris got home he looked skeptical since i was still laughing and talking and really calm and doing fine.  i tried to tell him it builds up gradually but he still wasn't believing me.  well, dinner wasn't really that great.  i lost my appetite and contractions were definitely getting more uncomfortable.  i went upstairs to get dressed (i was lounging in pajamas all day... i deserved it since i'd been on my feet 24/7 since mom arrived) and grab my last minute items to bring to the hospital with me.  contractions hurt enough that i had to pause while they were going on and then continue what i was doing when they passed.  it made things take a while.  (this must be a boring paragraph... i couldn't even find anything to bold.  oh, there we go.)

we left for the hospital around 8:00 and got there around 8:30.  while we were checking in i started feeling pretty nauseous and asked the receptionist for a trash can.  she politely handed me hers and i proceeded to put my dinner in it in between confirming my address and phone number, signing papers, etc.  so much for my dinner giving me energy for labor!  i'm terrified of being without food, so the idea of spending 24 hours (i'm a realist sometimes) in labor with no food was pretty scary. 

as we left for the hospital

anyways, they sent us to an observation room (not too happy about this because when you're not even admitted yet, you can't ask for an epidural!) and had me change into a hospital gown.  they hooked me up to a bunch of monitors and checked me.  i was pleased to hear i was at a 4 and 90% and that i was definitely in labor (but at least i already knew that part)!

definitely only smiling for the camera.  i was in PAIN.

chris is so good at labor.  he was loving life.

charts of my relentless contractions

she told me my contractions were coming one right after another (and lasting about a minute i think).  i told her i figured as much because i wasn't getting a break from the pain anymore.  i had about four people ask me to rate my pain on a one to ten scale.  well, i haven't felt a lot of pain in my life and i have a low threshold for it so i said an eight or nine or something.  they asked me to rate (still on a ten point scale) how much pain was okay with me.  ummm what?  NO PAIN.  i thought that was an incredibly stupid question.  i'm not okay with a three or a two (which is what i started to say until i realized how stupid the question was).  i want a ZERO.  even better, i would like negative pain.  I LIKE TO FEEL GOOD.  so after telling them for the tenth time "I DON'T LIKE TO FEEL ANY PAIN.  NO PAIN IS OKAY.  YES, I WOULD PLEASE LIKE AN EPIDURAL AS SOON AS THAT BECOMES AVAILABLE TO ME." they started moving things along a bit faster.  i guess all of that in the observation room was maybe only 30 minutes or so but with constant contractions and two doctors and about six nurses asking you if pain is okay, it just felt longer.

the labor and delivery room was real nice.  i kept telling chris to take pictures of it all but he thought that was kind of silly.  maybe but whatever.  i thought the room was big and well lit and even pretty.  all of the nurses in there were super super nice.  they gave me some pain stuff to take the edge off things since the epidural guy was taking so long.  the nurse kept telling me over and over that it would feel like i'd had a few margaritas.  i found that humorous since i have no idea what that would feel like.  so i was glad that she said it would make me feel a little lightheaded and sleepy.  oh okay, that description is much more helpful.  it did make me feel a little drowsy.  now i know what tipsy feels like!  the epidural guy came in and tried to brace me for the pain of getting the epidural needle or something.  i think i felt a poke but honestly it felt just fabulous compared to those contractions that were so completely painless just three hours before.  the epidural worked immediately on my left half (which is right when i semi felt my water break... i had to ask a nurse to confirm it, which she did with a worried face and got a another nurse to check it out.  i asked what was wrong and if there was meconium (that's baby-in-the-womb poop) in it.  she said just a little.  whew.) and not at all on my right half and was pretty spotty on my stomach.  SCARY.  i wanted that thing to be working all over and right away.  it was about that time that my back labor was getting worse so instead of concentrating on the contractions in my lower stomach, i had to shift my focus to my back.  (not like it even mattered because i hadn't bothered learning anything about pain management because my plan was to have NO PAIN.  we give that an F minus minus.)  they kept getting ice to check where the epidural was working.  i'd tell them if i felt nothing, slight pressure, or very cold ice (that was my answer to my entire right half... not good).  it didn't feel like long, but that is practically all i remember that was going on until they checked me again at midnight.

happy to be admitted

nurse getting stuff ready

hooked up to a bunch of stuff and feeling tipsy

they said that throughout my labor, they would be checking me every two hours to see how dilated and effaced i was.  i told them i was a 4 and 90% at 9:00 and hadn't been checked since then.  "three hours?  oh, we'll go ahead and check you right now."  great, i was excited to see if there was any progress but kinda scared there wouldn't be.  i think i was hoping to be at least at a 6.  well, one nurse, then two, both got that surprised look on their faces and told me i was at a 10 and 100% effaced and ready to go!  wow!  that sure was fast!  i had planned for a really really long labor.  seriously, i was anticipating 24 hours of it at least.  my hospital bagS (there were two for me, and one for chris) had my journal, crocheting, scriptures, a book, skipbo, and a bunch of other things to keep me occupied if i didn't feel like sleeping or hanging out while i was in labor.  but there was just no time for any of that.  i swear, we didn't need a single thing in our hospital bags until it was time to go home.  didn't even open them.  anyways...

last time picture of our family of two

after they told me i was all ready to push, they told me i couldn't yet because i had to wait for them to go get the doctor.  well, the doctor came like a half hour later.  in that time, the epidural guy FINALLY came back to see why i still had feeling on my right side.  the nurses basically told him to go away because he was too late and we didn't need him and i was about to push.  i don't know why, but i thought it was comical.  it was then that i finally realized that the epidural was actually working all over and i hadn't even really noticed it amid all of the excitement!  when the doctor came, she checked me out i think, probably just for kicks and i think it was while she and the nurses were all gathered around that they had me do a practice push or two.  the next two things the nurses told me were loud and clear.  "you are an amazing pusher!" and "do NOT push anymore until the doctor finishes getting ready!!!"  i was relieved to hear them say i was a good pusher because i was afraid i wouldn't be able to push very well since i couldn't feel anything even remotely close to where i was supposed to be pushing.

so at 12:40, the doctor came back and told me i could start pushing for real.  the next half hour was so so so much fun!  we were joking and laughing with the nurses and having a grand old time pushing a baby out.  they told me i was doing great and that i made labor look easy and that i was so lucky to have such a good labor with my first kid and on and on.  as i said before, I LOVED THOSE NURSES!!!  now THAT is what you want to hear during labor.  but honestly, it WAS so easy... because I COULD NOT FEEL A DARN THING!  and i loved it.  i will say though, that watching our kid come out provided a lot of pushing motivation.  i really didn't think i would want to see anything but decided at the very last moment (and sent a nurse running out the door to find a mirror) that it would be too cool to miss.  after almost a half hour of super fun pushing (seriously, i was on a high) a purple head came out and everyone real excitedly started yelling " PUSH PUSH PUSH, KEEP PUSHING, DON'T STOP!".  well that scared the crap out of me!!!  i know i'm a little paranoid, but i honestly thought something was wrong.  first, because a purple head is sticking out making no noise (not sure if they're supposed to make noise yet) and second that they're frantically telling me to push without waiting for the next contraction.  well, just one more push and the body came out!  YEAY!!!  she was born at 1:08am!  but then i was still freaking out because of the deep purple color and that i heard no crying. 

right away they layed her on my belly (i gave them really specific orders ahead of time to give her straight to me).

 that assured me that nothing was wrong since they weren't whisking my kid away to do tests or anything.  i was still wondering why she wasn't crying but no one else seemed worried so i just went with it.

 she was very grabby and kept a strong grip on my fingers.

i know i've said it a million times, but i couldn't believe how purple she was!  literally purple.

see how purple?!?!

 while i was holding my kid, i was vaguely aware of being stitched up (small tear).  i held her for over an hour (seemed so short) and nursed her before i forked her over to the nurse to bathe her and weigh her and measure her, etc.

THAT was when i heard her cry for the first time.  she doesn't have a strong set of lungs.  it was that sweet, typical waah, pause, waah, pause newborn cry that you hear in the movies but you could tell she sure wasn't happy!  she was 8 lbs, 5.5 oz and 20.5 inches long. 

i was definitely surprised she was so big!  i was totally expecting something in the 6.5 to 7 pound range.  call me superficial but i like skinny babies... not those chunky ones with rolls.  well, i was glad to hear i had a hearty baby because i had seen her and there were no rolls.  she was just all muscle.  real lean.  that was when chris and i started calling her gladiator and sparta girl. she was perfect.

our first family picture

to be continued...

may the blogging live on!

let me just pat myself on the back and say

i've done a darn good job of blogging this month!

who's with me?!?!

my thoughts at 4:38pm

for lunch i ate strawberries with sour cream and brown sugar.

 ordinarily this would not be a problem except that it was my entire lunch.  a pint of strawberries, a few heaping spoonfuls of sour cream and a bowl full of brown sugar.  nutritious huh?  i feel sick.

my sleeping schedule right now is bad news.  i stay up late, sleep in, take a nap, and then can't fall asleep at night.  repeat.

i read honey's journal.  it's the only way i stay up to date on things.  yesterday i found out that he's going to south dakota and iowa on tuesday.  tuesday like tomorrow.  good thing i know now because apparently i'm his ride.  so now we all know what i'll be doing at 4:30am tuesday morning...

my parents and honey's family are coming in town this weekend for baby girl's blessing.  who's pumped?!?!

i'm going to stop writing now so i can make a breakfast burrito.  yum.

the camera compromise

after baby was born, i told honey i wanted to take her to get newborn pictures.  i love newborn pictures.  y'know, the really bizarre pictures where it's all black and then a baby is sleeping horizontally on a muscle man's shiny white arm. 

don't know what i'm talking about?  here's an example.

weird huh?  this one is way more bizarre.  where is that floating arm coming from?

told you

see that kid's expression?  i read on the blog i stole this from that the reason the kid is making that face is because she's in the process of relieving herself.  newborns are precious.

there are also the ones where the kid is dressed in some over the top weird hat.  like this.

check it out.  there are tons.

but i also love the ones where the newborn is in some strange crochet contraption...

but i really love the ones where they're photographed in some really unlikely situation.

sleeping?  yes.  sleeping in a basket placed as the centerpiece on a nicely set table?  questionable.  newborn, how did you get there?

okay, so i admit, i picked some of the more exaggerated pictures, but still.  newborn photography is pretty strange and i still love it.  so i wanted my kid photographed naked in a hat, basket, etc.  they just look cute.

unfortunately, honey was opposed.  my blogging sister's friend even had a photographer in the area she recommended so i thought it would be a breeze.  well, honey didn't want to pay $200 for a session and then even more to get prints.  especially since i would be wanting it every six months i'm sure and it would probably just feed a bad, addicting habit.  so he said, "i'd rather just spend the money on a really nice camera and take our own."  i told him it really couldn't be replicated.  i mean, where am i going to find weird hats and a safe way to hang my crocheted kid from a tree in a field?  and how do i get my baby daddy's arms so finely chiseled?  but joking aside, i considered it.  maybe a week later i came to him and told him i'd like to spend lots of bucks on a nice camera and he said "hmm, i like that idea!"

boring story short, we researched cameras and bought one.  while we were waiting for it to be delivered, he complimented me on my great idea.  i should have played along.  but i didn't.  i had to know.  have you really thought this whole time that i came up with the idea to buy a camera instead of periodically taking our kid to a pro?  well, turns out he had.  he'd totally been congratulating me on my brilliant idea.  my genius stanford husband.  he sure cracks me up sometimes.

that week, we tried out a few practice poses with baby and it was a major fail.  she's very wiggly.  honey was sad she was too big for newborn poses.  i told him that's what you get for not jumping on my wagon for a few weeks.  your kid doubles in age and then she's too big.  especially since our kid lost her newborn face when she was only 9 or 10 days old.  she's very mature looking now.

monday afternoon our camera came!  here is a picture of honey opening everything up!  he looked so cute.

so monday night while i was holding our child, chris got antsy and started snapping away with our new camera.  i held up the blanket with my chin and extra hand.  it was very official looking.  don't you think?

but we got some pretty good shots...

and then we put her on the bed.  like so.

i love this picture.  pretty funny looking huh?

and we got some pretty pictures like this

i love love love this one

so, needless to say, it was very unofficial but to have a few prints to frame around the house and whatever, i think it's pretty alright.

ps- i think this one might be my favorite...

isn't my kid pretty?

boring update on baby's cries

although it's making things more challenging than before, i'm excited that baby is developping a personality and preferences and such.  as i mentioned before, around four weeks, she showed her first signs of fussiness.  it's gradually increasing which is, ehh, new and interesting.  according to every site google has to offer, fussiness peaks at six weeks.  we'll see if that's true for baby since she hasn't really been cookie cutter perfection so far.  it would be nice for it to start decreasing a little... or at least plateau.

it's not like she cries for no reason, but she let's you know when she's unhappy, which is a change from the past.

my favorite times she fusses are when you leave the room (like when i wash my hands after i change her diaper) or when she's hungry.  i love swooping her up in my arms and seeing her sweet face grow nicely content and relaxed.

my least favorite cry is when she needs to burp but i can't get one out of her.  it's so such a sad face she has and her cry makes it sound like she's in pain.  it breaks my heart every time.

poor babygirl

fyi, this shirt used to be white... but thanks to the laundry incident, not anymore!  don't you think it's a nice shade of pink though?

and the most useful cry comes during the night.  before, i never really let myself get all the way asleep because since she didn't cry, i had to listen out for her whimpers.  but now i let myself sleep soundly because i know she'll wake me up if she needs to eat. 

well.  honey is home from redbox so i gotta go.  well, okay, i'm not THAT excited about the movies.  i've never been a movie person.  but when we watch movies he makes pudding... and sometimes kettle corn too!  that's how he gets me to like watching movies with him.  food bribes.

it works.

i love picasa

baby's first album cover

picasa is wonderful.  in case you didn't know, it's google's free photo editing program and i am in love with it.  i used to just use redeye, crop, i'm feeling lucky (that's my favorite button... you press it and your picture is magically prettier) y'know.  the basics.  but now i'm taking a million pictures a day and it's fun to see how different you can make it look from the original!  a complete transformation!

one time i took one of baby's pictures.  i did "i'm feeling lucky" and cropped it.  then i brightened it and retouched it to make her little baby acne disappear.  and then i fuzzed around the edges.  and then i tried it out in black and white, and then in sepia, and then, well, i was obviously getting carried away.  so i moved on and got carried away with a bunch of other pictures too!  hello new obsession.  how are you doing?

anyways, i'm feeling too lazy right now to post any before and afters but take it from me.  for having no talent, i'm able to do some fine things with picasa.  and kill a lot of dead nap time.

so how do you like baby's album cover?  i hope she never has an album but i'm fine with her having an album cover... y'know, if that's something she'd ever like to do.  this is actually the exact picture i took (with a regular point and shoot camera) but just with the different coloring effects.  pretty cool for not having to spend any money huh?  looks almost professional don't you think?  no?  flatter me.  

straight up lie to me. 

i'll like you better for it.

apparently i'm white trash

i never really thought of myself as the white trash type.  i know i wasn't growing up.

lawyer dad: check
private school education: check
name brand everything: check

see?  not white trash.

but check out this glorious picture...

does this make anyone else want to reconsider my trash status?

let's evaluate.

here are the cons:
greasy hair pulled back in ponytail... hasn't showered lately
naked baby wearing only a diaper... typical white trash
wearing pajamas... not fabulous
diaper burp rag anticipating vomit... yum
spit up on the shirt... slightly understandable although still gross
nasty gus gus... double bad for peeking out from under my shirt while hanging over my waistband
stolen absolute t-shirt from a party school i didn't even attend... ummm, we have problems
and my kid looks like a boy... whoops

here are the pros:
ralph lauren pajamas... good taste?  evidence of prior non-white trash life?


hmm, not looking too good.

so, who wants to tally that up?

do i get credit that my manly looking baby girl is smiling?  (that was the reason the picture was taken in the first place anyways)

most importantly, who still wants to be my friend?