may the blogging live on!

let me just pat myself on the back and say

i've done a darn good job of blogging this month!

who's with me?!?!

my thoughts at 4:38pm

for lunch i ate strawberries with sour cream and brown sugar.

 ordinarily this would not be a problem except that it was my entire lunch.  a pint of strawberries, a few heaping spoonfuls of sour cream and a bowl full of brown sugar.  nutritious huh?  i feel sick.

my sleeping schedule right now is bad news.  i stay up late, sleep in, take a nap, and then can't fall asleep at night.  repeat.

i read honey's journal.  it's the only way i stay up to date on things.  yesterday i found out that he's going to south dakota and iowa on tuesday.  tuesday like tomorrow.  good thing i know now because apparently i'm his ride.  so now we all know what i'll be doing at 4:30am tuesday morning...

my parents and honey's family are coming in town this weekend for baby girl's blessing.  who's pumped?!?!

i'm going to stop writing now so i can make a breakfast burrito.  yum.

the camera compromise

after baby was born, i told honey i wanted to take her to get newborn pictures.  i love newborn pictures.  y'know, the really bizarre pictures where it's all black and then a baby is sleeping horizontally on a muscle man's shiny white arm. 

don't know what i'm talking about?  here's an example.

weird huh?  this one is way more bizarre.  where is that floating arm coming from?

told you

see that kid's expression?  i read on the blog i stole this from that the reason the kid is making that face is because she's in the process of relieving herself.  newborns are precious.

there are also the ones where the kid is dressed in some over the top weird hat.  like this.

check it out.  there are tons.

but i also love the ones where the newborn is in some strange crochet contraption...

but i really love the ones where they're photographed in some really unlikely situation.

sleeping?  yes.  sleeping in a basket placed as the centerpiece on a nicely set table?  questionable.  newborn, how did you get there?

okay, so i admit, i picked some of the more exaggerated pictures, but still.  newborn photography is pretty strange and i still love it.  so i wanted my kid photographed naked in a hat, basket, etc.  they just look cute.

unfortunately, honey was opposed.  my blogging sister's friend even had a photographer in the area she recommended so i thought it would be a breeze.  well, honey didn't want to pay $200 for a session and then even more to get prints.  especially since i would be wanting it every six months i'm sure and it would probably just feed a bad, addicting habit.  so he said, "i'd rather just spend the money on a really nice camera and take our own."  i told him it really couldn't be replicated.  i mean, where am i going to find weird hats and a safe way to hang my crocheted kid from a tree in a field?  and how do i get my baby daddy's arms so finely chiseled?  but joking aside, i considered it.  maybe a week later i came to him and told him i'd like to spend lots of bucks on a nice camera and he said "hmm, i like that idea!"

boring story short, we researched cameras and bought one.  while we were waiting for it to be delivered, he complimented me on my great idea.  i should have played along.  but i didn't.  i had to know.  have you really thought this whole time that i came up with the idea to buy a camera instead of periodically taking our kid to a pro?  well, turns out he had.  he'd totally been congratulating me on my brilliant idea.  my genius stanford husband.  he sure cracks me up sometimes.

that week, we tried out a few practice poses with baby and it was a major fail.  she's very wiggly.  honey was sad she was too big for newborn poses.  i told him that's what you get for not jumping on my wagon for a few weeks.  your kid doubles in age and then she's too big.  especially since our kid lost her newborn face when she was only 9 or 10 days old.  she's very mature looking now.

monday afternoon our camera came!  here is a picture of honey opening everything up!  he looked so cute.

so monday night while i was holding our child, chris got antsy and started snapping away with our new camera.  i held up the blanket with my chin and extra hand.  it was very official looking.  don't you think?

but we got some pretty good shots...

and then we put her on the bed.  like so.

i love this picture.  pretty funny looking huh?

and we got some pretty pictures like this

i love love love this one

so, needless to say, it was very unofficial but to have a few prints to frame around the house and whatever, i think it's pretty alright.

ps- i think this one might be my favorite...

isn't my kid pretty?

boring update on baby's cries

although it's making things more challenging than before, i'm excited that baby is developping a personality and preferences and such.  as i mentioned before, around four weeks, she showed her first signs of fussiness.  it's gradually increasing which is, ehh, new and interesting.  according to every site google has to offer, fussiness peaks at six weeks.  we'll see if that's true for baby since she hasn't really been cookie cutter perfection so far.  it would be nice for it to start decreasing a little... or at least plateau.

it's not like she cries for no reason, but she let's you know when she's unhappy, which is a change from the past.

my favorite times she fusses are when you leave the room (like when i wash my hands after i change her diaper) or when she's hungry.  i love swooping her up in my arms and seeing her sweet face grow nicely content and relaxed.

my least favorite cry is when she needs to burp but i can't get one out of her.  it's so such a sad face she has and her cry makes it sound like she's in pain.  it breaks my heart every time.

poor babygirl

fyi, this shirt used to be white... but thanks to the laundry incident, not anymore!  don't you think it's a nice shade of pink though?

and the most useful cry comes during the night.  before, i never really let myself get all the way asleep because since she didn't cry, i had to listen out for her whimpers.  but now i let myself sleep soundly because i know she'll wake me up if she needs to eat. 

well.  honey is home from redbox so i gotta go.  well, okay, i'm not THAT excited about the movies.  i've never been a movie person.  but when we watch movies he makes pudding... and sometimes kettle corn too!  that's how he gets me to like watching movies with him.  food bribes.

it works.

i love picasa

baby's first album cover

picasa is wonderful.  in case you didn't know, it's google's free photo editing program and i am in love with it.  i used to just use redeye, crop, i'm feeling lucky (that's my favorite button... you press it and your picture is magically prettier) y'know.  the basics.  but now i'm taking a million pictures a day and it's fun to see how different you can make it look from the original!  a complete transformation!

one time i took one of baby's pictures.  i did "i'm feeling lucky" and cropped it.  then i brightened it and retouched it to make her little baby acne disappear.  and then i fuzzed around the edges.  and then i tried it out in black and white, and then in sepia, and then, well, i was obviously getting carried away.  so i moved on and got carried away with a bunch of other pictures too!  hello new obsession.  how are you doing?

anyways, i'm feeling too lazy right now to post any before and afters but take it from me.  for having no talent, i'm able to do some fine things with picasa.  and kill a lot of dead nap time.

so how do you like baby's album cover?  i hope she never has an album but i'm fine with her having an album cover... y'know, if that's something she'd ever like to do.  this is actually the exact picture i took (with a regular point and shoot camera) but just with the different coloring effects.  pretty cool for not having to spend any money huh?  looks almost professional don't you think?  no?  flatter me.  

straight up lie to me. 

i'll like you better for it.

apparently i'm white trash

i never really thought of myself as the white trash type.  i know i wasn't growing up.

lawyer dad: check
private school education: check
name brand everything: check

see?  not white trash.

but check out this glorious picture...

does this make anyone else want to reconsider my trash status?

let's evaluate.

here are the cons:
greasy hair pulled back in ponytail... hasn't showered lately
naked baby wearing only a diaper... typical white trash
wearing pajamas... not fabulous
diaper burp rag anticipating vomit... yum
spit up on the shirt... slightly understandable although still gross
nasty gus gus... double bad for peeking out from under my shirt while hanging over my waistband
stolen absolute t-shirt from a party school i didn't even attend... ummm, we have problems
and my kid looks like a boy... whoops

here are the pros:
ralph lauren pajamas... good taste?  evidence of prior non-white trash life?


hmm, not looking too good.

so, who wants to tally that up?

do i get credit that my manly looking baby girl is smiling?  (that was the reason the picture was taken in the first place anyways)

most importantly, who still wants to be my friend?

california, i love to find reasons to hate you

california,

what the heck?!?!  it's been cold all summer and then today it's over a hundred degrees?!?!  what kind of sick joke is this?  we are not laughing.  not me, not baby girl, not honey. 

i was at a backyard bbq on saturday.  luckily i happened to be wearing long sleeves.  most of the other people there though came in short sleeves.  i marveled at how they all knew to bring jackets, which they put on about half way through.  why should anyone in california have to wear a puffy coat with fur in late august?  oh, they shouldn't. 

our apartment doesn't have AC.  it hasn't been a problem since we moved in.  we keep windows open at night and closed during the day.  and frequently it's gotten cold enough that we've had to reverse it.  but today, it was just hot.  tonight is reminding me of our summer in the provo where i was constantly drenched in my own sweat.  between puke, poop, and perspiration (only the sweat was mine) i've changed clothes several times today.  and every time i'm sad that my new clothes only stay dry for about two seconds.

ordinarily this wouldn't be a real problem except for the fact that some like it hot, and some don't.  and baby girl, she don't like it hot.  everyone talks about that newborn/postpartum blur.  i feel like i have (minus the sleep deprivation) experienced it very mildly tonight for about six hours and it hasn't been fun.  i've felt totally out of control.  it's like i have no clue what's going to happen so i have no clue what to expect so i have no way to prepare.  i don't know if she'll go to sleep or stay asleep or want to eat or stay awake to eat or want to play or want to hang out.  i'm clueless.  poor baby is so uncomfortable, she can't sleep for more than an hour before she wakes up (and is pretty unhappy about it), but she can't really stay awake because the heat makes her sleepy, and she can't enjoy being awake because it's hotter than hades in here!

so the semi blur happened when i stopped being able to time her naps on my baby timer because she was drifting in and out of sleep so often, including in my arms.  if i can't time it on the timer then we're in trouble because baby timer = my brain.  anyways, i've tried swaddled, unswaddled, sleep in crib, sleep in basket, sleep in basket in closet under the stairs (very harry potter-esque), etc.  she falls asleep in my arms but i have about six minutes of patience for that until i put her down which wakes her up (she is so consistent about waking up when i put her down that i use it as my tactic to make sure she gets a full feeding) and then it's back to a sad and sleepy (and sweaty) baby.

and as real mothers would know, there is just a special pain you feel when you know your kid is uncomfortable.  but as we all know, there is also a special fear you feel when you anticipate a rough night ahead of you.  this is the special feeling that i'm feeling.  i haven't had any rough nights with baby girl yet.  she's never cried at night, and ever since i started letting her sleep through the night, she's never gone less than a five hour stretch.  even though it hasn't been 100%, i've gotten semi used to not having to wake up for a night feeding.  so anyways, i anticipate tonight being our worst night yet.  and i am fearful.

speaking of fearful.  while i was eating a bowl of brownie batter (it's honey's fault for not getting it in the oven fast enough) i realized that i have my six week postpartum checkup tomorrow morning and they are going to weigh me.  all of the crack brownies, mother-in-law's cookies, butter drenched bagels, lindt truffles, sugared cereals, chocolate chips, and brownie batter are all going to be quantified into three big digits on a nice clear display.  please be less than 154... if i have surpassed my pregnancy weight, i might die.

this is baby girl not napping

a little thumb sucking

thought i was kidding about the closet?  i wasn't.

but california, back to you.  you're already on my bad list.  stop making it worse.


and when i find a way to blame you for making me fat, you better believe i'm gonna pin it to you.

EXTRA pink laundry

the other day i did laundry.  actually, most days i do laundry.  it's really nice.  i love this whole daily laundry thing.  before, i used to save up laundry for a few weeks and then do five loads at once (in our apartment laundry room).  it was nice that i could be done start to finish in a few hours but it made for a pretty intense night.

well, the other day, when my washer load finished, i opened it up and had one of those "i love my life" moments.  they come so often these days that i have to take pictures sometimes to keep track of the really good ones.  there are a million reasons to pray for a little girl.  pink laundry is on the list.  you see, pink is my favorite color.  so you can only imagine how fun it is to do loads of laundry that look like this. 

there are a few things that don't belong to baby girl

as i was transferring laundry over to the dryer i noticed something out of the ordinary.  my [white] washable nursing pads had turned pink.  i was thrilled!  although a little confused and hesitant as well.

yes, i'm posting a picture of my nursing pads on the internet.  now the world knows they are pink.

i looked through the laundry to see what else might have turned pink and i found this elephant sleeper.  if you've seen pictures of baby girl wearing this sleeper, you know it used to be stark white.  not anymore!

i used to hate cleaning out the dryer fuzz... but when it's pink i actually really enjoy it!

when i was putting the dry laundry away, i was noticing that maybe i had initially overlooked a few things.  maybe it was more than just the nursing pads and elephant sleeper.  the casualty list grew.

these changing table covers used to be the same shade of pink.

the top blanket used to be pink and white stripes.  now it's pink and lighter pink.  the blanket underneath has a hint of rose.  and the other blankets are more pink than they were before!

on the changing table, i have a regular changing table cover.  on top of that i have a burp cloth as well as a waterproof white pad.  i don't expect this to always be a necessity but it seems like in these early weeks, babies seem to be oozing or exploding out of every orifice.  these make clean up very quick and easy.  the cover is now extra pink, the burp cloth used to be white with pink flowers... actually, it used to be the same white as that waterproof mat!

the new look

and here is a picture of the culprit.  random red shirt from china.  never been washed.

the guilty party

there are even more things that i didn't take pictures of... a few onesies and maybe some socks or a hair bow.  if you look at baby's facebook pictures maybe you'll notice that the white snail onesie with the brown polka dots and pink trim is now pink with brown dots.  so although everything white turned pink, and everything pink turned pinker, somehow nothing in the wash was actually ruined!  now, if baby girl was actually baby boy then that would have been another story...

it's august 21st...

happy birthday to my favorite non-blogging sister!  we love you and miss you lots and lots!

ps- i got skype... so get pumped for video birthday wishes this afternoon!

domestic me

as much as i love eating, i'm not too much a fan of cooking.  it gives me anxiety when multiple things are going at one time and it stresses me out.  and i'm not too great at it.  i have a bad memory.  the other day i boiled eggs and forgot about them because i was so excited to see chris come home from work.  well 45 minutes later i remembered... pretty much all of the water had boiled out.  that's how my cooking goes.  or the time i made muffins and forgot the salt.  i was scooping batter out of the muffin pan and back into the bowl... it was not fun.  and remember this?  i think i've proved my point.  it's a problem.  and my husband doesn't even care if i cook.  he prefers cereal.  see, we were made for each other.

being a nanny, i really didn't eat much at home.  bowl of cereal in the morning, bowl at night.  everything else, i ate at work.  i mean, i was there for ten hours a day.  and it was good food.  and i didn't have to pay for it.  but now i can go days without leaving these walls (call me crazy but i like it), which means i'm limited to eating the food offered within the confines of my own home and it's getting kind of boring.  especially because i'm binge eating 24/7 (i'm currently stuffing my face with chocolate chips) but more on that another time.

so, yesterday i decided to make a meal.  well, more like an entree.  an entree of a meal.  i didn't serve it with anything else.   i made chicken enchiladas.  i took it real real slow and didn't even hyperventilate.  it made me feel real accomplished so i took pictures to preserve the moment... and to prove that i can be domestic every once in a while.

i'll even tell you how i made it... so you can make it too...  just in case you're like me and you have to eat anything that you see, read, smell, or hear the name of.

mix a can of condensed cream of chicken soup with a half cup of sour cream... or in my case, how ever much you happen to have left in your fridge.  which was a sad story because i would have liked to have had some left to eat with it when it was served.  i LOVE sour cream.  smear a spoonful or two around the bottom of your casserole dish.

make a chicken mixture.  this involves butter, chopped up onion, a little chili powder (i only added half of what it called for and it was still a little out of my comfort zone - i don't do spicy), can of diced green chilis, and cooked chicken.  pretty sure the chicken isn't supposed to be perfectly cubed but that's what i happened to have so i just went with it.  those things all have measurements but i didn't measure any of it so i hope you won't bother either.  why does the shape of chocolate chips make them taste so much better than regular chocolate?!?!

set up your assembly station and make it happen like in the picture.  clockwise, mine included soup mixture, casserole pan (i think i used the wrong size... does this look like 2 quarts?), glass of milk (or drink of your choice...always good to stay hydrated), chicken mixture, place where the magic happens (i used a cutting board), recipe, tortillas, and baby timer (because this never. leaves. my. side.) if you have a baby.  i used my kitchen table for all of this so i could sit down.  as i said, i took it SLOW.  and i am naturally a really slow person.  probably the slowest person you've ever met. 

when you finish rolling chicken inside those tortillas (and putting them seam-side down!) pour the rest of the soup mixture on top.

cover with delicious cheese of your choice (but don't get carried away with feta or gruyere or something weird like that).  i put extra green chilis on the top... but only because i got the super cheap 7oz can instead of the tiny 4oz one that cost just as much.  this is when i covered it an stuck it in the fridge... not required but it was only 2:30 and my honey wasn't getting home for a few hours.

while it's in the fridge, treat yourself to a bowl of cereal.  you deserve it.

thought i was lying about the cereal?  i wasn't.  here's some of our backup that we keep hidden behind the regulars on display.  you better believe there's more backup up top that was too lazy to uncover for the picture.

stick it in a preheated oven about 30 minutes before your honey gets home.  nothing needs to cook, just heat up.  i put mine on 350 and it was hot enough.

maybe your honey will maul you and tell you it's the best thing he's ever tasted in his entire life.  that's not really my honey's style.  he'll eat a bowl of cereal and then sit down to eat your chicken enchiladas.  after you've waited a polite amount of time and you ask him how he likes it, he may tell you it's the best thing you've made in months.  my honey is real nice, but he won't lie to me.  most often i get a shrug that basically says, "thanks for the effort but i'll just have another bowl of cereal please."  so this was a pretty big deal.  it also got me thinking of the losers i've made in the last few months... hm.

time to increase my repertoire.

a dress for my baby

this is my friend carolyn.

because of my dear friend carolyn, my baby girl has the most beautiful dress on the planet.  she made little abigail a baby blessing dress and it is busting at the seams with love.  the fabric and lace are gorgeous.  the puffy sleeves are precious.  everything about it is absolutely perfect.

one day on facebook chat, i jokingly told carolyn that she should make my baby a blessing dress.  she totally jumped on it!  and no joke, the dress was practically done within 48 hours because that is how carolyn is.  so excited to do nice things... especially to do nice things for me... and consequently, my child, who she affectionately refers to as the future mrs. benjamin turnage.

the dress just arrived this evening so i haven't had time to take any pictures of it (although i'm sure there will be some in a few weeks from the blessing!) but i will direct you to a few on carolyn's blog.  since she's so on top of things and so good at life, she has a whole blog post dedicated to it! 

so CHECK IT OUT.

guns

this is my kid flexing in her swimsuit.

too bad we won't see the beach til christmas because

WE ARE READY!

it's august 15th...

which means it's been a whole month since this...

my smile and my child are roughly two inches bigger now.

recap on zita's visit

so, as i may or may not have said before, can't remember and i'm too lazy to check, zita is experiencing the states for the first time.  i think she goes home in a few days, but she's been hanging out in utah (somewhere around lehi i think) for a couple of months.  chris got her to come out here to visit us, and the state of california, for the weekend (last weekend... i'm just slow) and we had a ton of fun.  here is a picture summary of our fun.

standing in front of hoover tower

at the top of hoover tower

the whole party

on campus in front of memorial church

zita picked up on skip bo in all of two seconds.  she was SO good.

baby girl has got an intense stare

monterey

along 17 mile drive

where's waldo?

i love the beach.  even if it's the wrong ocean...

there he is!

too bad it wasn't sunnier... or at least warmer!

check us out, we're standing on a pole.

lone cyprus.  how pretty is that?

baby girl was NOT thrilled that we woke her up to go to the beach.

they put their feet in the water at several beaches even though it was ICY cold.  it was zita's FIRST TIME EVER experiencing the beach/ocean/sea.  i made her taste the water.  she was surprised how salty it was.  ha.

zita wanted her picture with baby abigail

in front of alcatraz

so there you have it.  stanford campus on thursday and friday.  down the coast for 17 mile drive, monterey, and carmel on saturday.  up to san francisco on sunday.  we had a blast.

ps- zita's favorite food here in the states is costco hot dogs.  she said her least favorite food is "steaks" although the first four times i asked her she was definitely saying "snakes."  i told her that's not an american food and soon enough we understood each other.  it was great.