Wednesday, February 20, 2013

nightly news

the thoughts swarming in my head

my honey has been traveling a lot lately.  way too much for my liking.  like every week... sometimes days at a time.  it has given me more appreciation for how much i need him.  i don't feel like i "needed" him as a parent until brady came along.  now i need him.  i need him to be home so i don't have to take two kids to young women with me.  i need him to listen to my day.  i need him to do the dishes that have piled up and pour a bowl of cereal for baby girl.  and i need him to just physically be there next to me.  having brady has brought us closer.

my next door neighbors that i've always been more than mildly obsessed with?  know who i'm talking about?  the ones in our ward where the husband saved my life that one time and the wife has gladly given/loaned me sugar, ketchup, cream of tartar, a bundt pan, and even $5 (yes, i showed up on their doorstep on a friday night to borrow cash so i could attend a local middle school play... why doesn't everywhere take credit card?!  like garage sales too), and the daughter that was my beehive president and is more mature than i will ever be.  and their dog, duke, that passed away last summer... i almost cried when that happened.  well, they moved.  to utah.  it just happened last week and i'm not even kidding that i've been working my way through the five stages of grief.  i'm currently in the "depression" stage and i'll let you know when i get to "acceptance" if that day ever comes.  unfortunately i'm somewhat confident it never will.  i haven't met our new neighbors yet although i have full intentions of taking over a plate of rice krispie treats (who doesn't love those?!) once it stops snowing.  and i'll give them the copy of their house key that i have.  i hope that's not awkward.

i'm compiling a list of quotes from abigail.  her speaking skills are awesome and so so cute.  and so are her mannerisms and everything else about her.  for years and years i have said that two is my favorite age.  baby girl just confirms that.  two is magical.  i'm nervous for three though... i've never been a fan of the threes.  but for the next few months, you better believe i'm going to soak up baby girl being two.  i thought i enjoyed her as a baby but honestly that was nothing.  she just keeps getting better with age.

i need to write a two month post for brady.  this will be difficult because i am still trying to figure out who the heck he is.  there has got to be a rhyme and reason to him, right?!  also, let's have a group fast that he will start sleeping longer stretches at night.  because FOR THE LOVE. BRADY!  the idea is that your nighttime sleep improves with age!  you are two months old... abigail was sleeping 12-13 hours a night at this point.  every. single. night.  i know you've got reflux but work with me here... i'm begging you.

how did i ever live with out my iphone?  seriously seriously seriously.  it is worth every single penny.

so glad the hockey lockout is over.  i really do love that sport.  i love watching games with my honey.  and it's only been a few weeks but my fantasy hockey team is currently undefeated.  and there are 14 people in the league.  call us a power couple but honey is actually the only other undefeated team in the league.  it's pretty cool.  and yes, i realize how ridiculous i sound right now.

i spend my mornings and my days being so exhausted and then when night time comes, i have such a hard time clearing my head so i can fall asleep.  that does not serve me well in my already sleep deprived state.

i haven't been cooking much at all lately.  i have still been eating cheese eggs on toast once a day (sometimes breakfast but sometimes lunch or dinner) and other than that, my diet is mostly chocolates, creme brulee (i ran out yesterday but mark my words i'll make another batch!), and chocolate cookies from one of honey's clients.  i have never been a healthy eater but i can honestly not recall the last time i've eaten so much sugar on a daily basis.  i'm trying not to think about it.  anyone want to come cook for me?  i would gladly trade all of the chocolate in the world for a pan of lasagna.  right now, it's all about convenience.

i used to be concerned about huge world problems... like people living in third world countries, problems close to home... homeless people in atlanta, and keeping up with family and friends (i used to actually be social).  moving to parker, i started living in a bubble and while i thought about homeless people, my life was enough removed that it didn't stress me out on a daily basis (it's terrible to say but i hate that i care so much).  so my concerns turned to my calling, being a good mom, keeping in touch with close family and friends, being healthy, keeping a clean home, recycling and not using too much gas/electricity/water, and other random stuff like that.  well brady has narrowed things down even more and now i pretty much just focus on what happens within the walls of my own home.  every day i wake up and i try to be a good mom, be a good wife, and keep my house clean (it's actually impossible for me to be happy or a good wife/mother if my house is cluttered or dirty so really these are interlocked).  i have had to let go (at least for the time being) when it comes to keeping in touch with people (i have GOT to start doing better at this... especially calling my grandparents), being healthy (christopher doesn't even bother asking what's for dinner anymore.  he just comes home and pours himself a bowl of cereal and makes himself a quesadilla.), trying to do a good job at my calling (i just try to keep up with what is required), and a million other things.  i'm still stressing on a daily basis about homeless people but i try to channel that energy to being a good mom.  i'm taking a lesson from president hinckley... my mantra as of late has been, "the greatest work you will ever do will be within the walls of your own home."  and i'm taking it day by day.

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