7 weeks

How far along:  7 weeks  (10.16.14)

Total weight gain/loss: -1.5 lb

Maternity clothes:  yes... but only because i wear maternity clothes as part of my regular wardrobe. 

Sleep:  not awesome but i took a full unisom on tuesday night and slept a full 12.5 hours.  from 9:20pm til 9:50am.  not that i've been super tired during the day, but i am pretty miserable during my waking hours... so any shortening of that misery is greatly appreciated.  the next night i only took half.  ; )

Best moment this week:  my appointment on monday.  so so happy to see my little bean and see and hear a heartbeat!  everything looks healthy and right on track!  as a side note... i'm not a fan of the np i met with... dr. parker.  maybe i'll shop around for a new np instead of struggling through it like i did with brady's pregnancy.

Movement:  just the unpleasant churning in my stomach.

Food cravings:  i hate eating.  i hate that it's a necessary part of my day.  i feel my very best about 30 minutes after i eat, because the nausea and hunger are reduced.  but the thing is, i kind of have trouble even enjoying that 45 minutes to an hour of not feeling so terrible because i'm already stressing about how that's going to wear off and then i'm going to have to eat again.  eating is the worst.  but, the upside?  my food aversions aren't as extreme as my pregnancy with abigail.  sometimes i can think of something that doesn't sound atrocious, and then i rush to eat it as soon as i possibly can.  this is great if it is something i can make.  not so great when it's something i don't have available to me.  at the grocery store tuesday night, chris had the cart and the kids, and i just picked up whatever i thought i could stomach.  which included a nice variety ranging from water chestnuts to fish sticks, to hash browns, to a totinos frozen pizza.  the winner was the frozen pizza.  just thinking about fish right now makes me want to vomit.  this morning, at 10:10, i was stressing about what i'd eat for breakfast since yesterday's eggs didn't go over well.  i thought to myself, "i bet i could eat a chick fil a chicken biscuit..." and then i looked at myself (still in bathrobe from taking a shower), brady (still in pjs), and abigail (dressed, thankfully), and announced to abigail to get her shoes on because we were headed out.  i threw on clothes, put clothes for brady in my purse, and got us all in the car.  who cares that i had wet hair and no make up? i made it there by 10:29 (it's 15 minutes away) and was glad they still had chicken biscuits available.  i ate mine in the car while i told the kids to just hang on.  it didn't sit terribly well, but i wasn't gagging while i was eating it.  hallelujah!

Symptoms: nausea 

Gender:  my thoughts are still girl.  although more from the nausea and food aversions than anything else.

What I miss:  not feeling like crap 24/7.  the last few nights, i've been going to bed as early as possible, just so i can escape the headache and hunger.  

Milestones:  i feel like seeing my babe and hearing a heartbeat is a pretty big deal, is it not?
Theme: the week of a messy house
What's different this time around:  with brady, i think this was the hardest week of my morning sickness, still trying to figure out the nausea and get my body back into eating (i have trouble eating sometimes when i travel, and especially did on that napa trip), with abigail, i was full swing miserable.  this pregnancy, i think i'm somewhere in the middle.

Extra:  i'm not gonna lie, i was counting down the days til my appointment because i was excited to see my babe, but maybe just as much because i was anxious to get some drugs in me that would make me like eating a little more and help me not feel so crappy.  big disappointment.  the doctor gave me generic phenergan and i've taken it a few times, not noticing much of any difference.  i do hate the nausea, but worse than that is that eating makes me want to gag and cry.  it didn't occur to me that phenergan wouldn't do anything for my aversion to food.  i tried to get vitamin b6 at walmart tuesday night (because i've heard good things about that too), but they were out of pretty much every b vitamin.  so, i just continue to struggle through it.  speaking of... i feel like crap all day, every day.  i can experience an hour or two during the day where i feel a little better... but for the most part, it's very unenjoyable.  so i lay in bed for hours on end while the kids take out every toy, puzzle piece, etc. that we have.  they've even drawn on the walls and windows with pen and crayon.  thankfully, that all came off super easy, but seriously?!?!  since when did i become the mother that neglects her children enough that they color pen on the bathroom walls and crayon all over abigail's windows?!  apparently sometime mid october 2014.  my house has been such a disaster.  and i don't even care most of the time because i feel so crappy.  the feeling is like when you're getting over the stomach flu and you hate eating but you're starving and your body is weak... combined with fast sunday... for those same reasons... and a constant headache/migraine that can't be shaken.  it's fine for a normal person because it only lasts 24-36 hours.  weeks on end though and i'm already wearing thin.  lucy came over yesterday and i was still in my bathrobe... at 2:30 in the afternoon.  and i hadn't showered in days.  puzzle pieces and flash cards and toys completely covered our great room but luckily abigail took the blame for that mess.  then the girls came into the kitchen (i was sitting on that little brown chair sipping milk and nibbling on tater tots) to ask if they could go to lucy's.  then lucy looks at the floor and is all "why are there tater tots on your floor?" so i tell her it's because brady had some in a bowl but he dropped it (true story... the bowl was still there next to the tater tots) and she giggled and shrugged it off with an "ohhh".  but then she looked up.  and all around.  and was all "wow... your kitchen is r e a l l y messy!" and all i could say was "yeah."  the floor was covered in toys and dried up scrambled eggs from that morning.  there was a broom in the corner where i'd swept up a pile before breakfast but never cleaned it up (moving my head in elevation is terrible), the kitchen table had just as many dried up scrambled eggs, but also all of our dirty breakfast plates and cups.  the sink was full of dirty dishes and they extended all down the counter.  the island was also covered.  actually, every surface in our kitchen was tainted.  my honey is wonderful though.  somehow, he just knew (although he's been coming home to this filth so it's not too hard to see the need) and came home at 3:00.  at the time, abigail was at lucy's and i was laying on brady's bedroom floor (still in my bathrobe, of course) while he cried in his crib and refused to lay down for nap.  honey just walked right in.  he hugged me, and kissed me, and layed next to me on the floor and held me.  then he told brady to go to sleep and left us.  he went straight downstairs and started on the dishes.  i eventually gave up on brady and left him in his crib crying.  when i got to the kitchen, honey just said, "it's okay... go get him... he can go to bed early tonight." so i turned around and went back upstairs.  even the landing at the top of our stairs was covered in toys and dress up clothes.  i got brady out of his crib and i was already crying.  i felt like such a failure, but at the same time, so so grateful.  my honey did huge amounts of dishes, finished unloading the only half unloaded dishwasher from three days before, and loaded all the new dishes and washed all of the big dishes by hand, and wiped all the counter tops, and swept the floors, and took out the trash, and everything else.  all in between taking phone calls and working from home.  all without saying anything to me.  no huge announcement about how awesome he was or how i should owe him big or how on earth do i keep letting the house get so messy every day.  just quiet service.  i told him about how i haven't showered in days, and i feel so crappy.  he carved a pumpkin with abigail and spent such quality time with her, he took brady on a jog so i could have some alone time since abigail was at lucy's, he didn't say anything about how he was eating cereal for dinner... again.  i told him weeks ago when i was starting to feel sick, that he would need to prep himself a bit for some changes and pick up the slack for me.  he sure took it to heart because he's been doing a whole lot of that lately.  i feel so bad for the guy, but so overwhelmed with gratitude.