37 weeks

How far along:  37 weeks  (5.14.15) ...compared to abigail at 37 weeks and brady at 37 weeks

Total weight gain/loss: 28.5 lbs

Maternity clothes:  yes...  same as before.  i finally got out my maternity g tops.  don't ask why it took so long but eventually i got sick of trying to pull down my usual tops so the hem wouldn't show through my shirt and leave a line across my lower belly.  annoying that they don't taper in at the bottom though because then it's a problem of them bunching up at the waist of my pants.  how do i get a spot on the committee that designs g's??? 

Sleep:  not bad.  my dreams have been really lowkey and even normal almost.  one night i had a dream that i went into labor when i was already at the doctor's office (getting my cold checked out) and my labor progressed pretty pain free and really fast (maybe 15 minutes or so until my body was pushing my baby out) and then i was all "crap! i need to text chris and tell himi to hurry over here!" so i willed my body to wait... and by the time he arrived, i was no longer in labor and my baby was all safe and nestled in my uterus again.  but also, there was one night that i woke up and couldn't even remember re dreamt about.  

Best moment this week:  mother's day!  my honey rocked it and i felt totally taken care of and spoiled.

Movement:  even more intense than before if that's even possible.  also, baby got hiccups for the first time (that i've noticed) during second or third hour at church on sunday.

Food cravings:  i eat just because it's necessary.  i have zero motivation to prepare anything that requires more time or energy than egg salad sandwiches.  the teriyaki salmon that klaudette made on sunday was really tasty though.  i sure do love salmon. 

Symptoms: same as before but with a whole lotta pregnancy depression.  also, i've been having some sciatic pain... nothing super sharp or horrendous like with my pregnancy with abigail (there were times when i would literally fall on the floor or be unable to walk because the pain was so severe), but it's like a painful cramp on my left side depending on how i'm standing or sitting or sneezing (i've had a cold this week).   luckily it's not very noticeable and it's just something weird to make note of.  the pregnancy depression is pretty debilitating though.

Gender:  girl  ; )

What I miss:  being happy and motivated.  i'm either laying in bed, or wishing that i was laying in bed.  sad but true.

Milestones:  reaching full term!
Theme: the week of having a cold and laying in bed 24/7
What's different this time around/extra:  well, i just read through my 37 week posts with brady and abigail and things are sounding pretty similar!  minor differences are that with abigail, i was still getting tons of stretch marks and, so far as i'm aware, haven't gotten any more with brady's pregnancy or this pregnancy.  also, with abigail, i remember that i had itching so bad, i would scratch to the point of drawing blood and having scabs on my belly.  sorry, gross but true.  i used to have to take bags of peas and corn from the freezer and ice my belly to make it numb so i couldn't feel the itching anymore.  most everything else seems to be pretty similar.  all i wanted to do was lay down, my baby was moving like crazy, i was getting nostalgic for pregnancy to end, i was stressing about not being ready or having everything done that needed to be done, i wasn't crazy about eating, and... i was depressed.  it actually made me feel so much better just now to reread my 37 week post with brady and see just how depressed i was because it makes me feel not so alone (even if i am reading about myself) and because it reminds me that this is just pregnancy... this is just how i am when i'm pregnant and it's not something that'll last forever or something that means i'm a horrible person or a horrible mother.  i feel so blessed that my body handles pregnancy so well, but this pregnancy i've had to hesitate when someone asks me how i feel about being pregnant.  i'm all "oh i love it!  but it does make me really depressed and i lay in bed a lot and spend a lot of time crying" as if that even makes sense.  but it's true.  i love being pregnant, but being pregnant makes me hate everything else.  certain things (that a lot of people wouldn't even give a second thought to) completely drive me crazy and give me horrible rage.  but as i said, it gives me comfort to recognize that i'm experiencing pregnancy depression (strangely, i never got the third trimester depression survey this time around) and that i'm not just this horrible lazy person.  i mean, i am, but it's with reason.  saturday, monday, tuesday, and wednesday of this week all looked pretty similar and it made it easier for me to realize how the depression manifests itself in my behavior.  i did not bother getting dressed.  if i put clothes on, it was late in the day, and only because i was cold, and normally was a hoodie or a shirt with holes and either my giant gray girls camp sweats or yoga pants if i was being a little more fancy.  i didn't bother to put on makeup or wash off my previous makeup.  i regularly go lots of days in a row without showering.  i sometimes don't even bother to put in my contacts because even that seems overwhelming and like too much work.  i don't cook.  i don't clean.  my kitchen hasn't been swept in at least a week and it has enough food on the floor to feed a small african country.  for the last week and a half, my honey has cleaned the kitchen every night that he's been in town.  i yell at my children and actually prefer not to be around them.  even when i wake up at 7:30, i don't get out of bed til after 11 or whenever brady eventually yells at me to get him out of his crib.  i make my kids oatmeal for breakfast if i'm ambitious and then i lay in bed while they eat.  if i'm extra unable to handle life, i have abigail get bananas for the both of them to eat.  i pour one cup of water and have them share, instead of actually getting two cups of water.  i can't look at anything without immediately tracing back in my mind how it's screwed up by abigail (messed up curtains, toys or shoes left out, something broken, etc.) and yesterday, i literally cried when brady finished my box of chocolates that he stole from my nightstand.  gone are the days of me bursting with love and pride at my precious little children.  i mostly just wander around my house and wonder "why on earth can they not just listen or do a SINGLE thing that i've asked or that they know they're supposed to do?!"  and then of course i spend too much time online trying to research new parenting techniques to fix my children because obviously i'm their mother and i'm the reason they're so screwed up because i've failed them.  and then i give up and cry myself to sleep again and then wake up and cry some more.  i'm not looking for any sympathy, i just want to get this all down so that when i'm experiencing this yet again with my next pregnancy... i'll have this to comfort me.  and just so you don't get too worried... i will say that not every day is horrible.  i mean, today i showered (and got dressed and did my hair and makeup), fed myself, kept up with the dishes, have enjoyed my children more and been annoyed less, went to the library for story time (it's the first time i've left the house since sunday night), and have kept my patience about things that would normally be annoying to me and even cause me to yell, scream, and cry.  i won't lie... it's been a pretty good day.  but as far as things go generally, just forgive me for not returning your calls/texts/etc.  it's not because i don't love you.  it's just because i'm depressed and i want to be alone.  

ps- i went back to the library website and put the hypnobirthing book on hold again (well, the 3rd edition... i'd already requested the 4th edition) and that turned out to be a good move because i'm still on hold for the 4th edition (and have been since april 30th or something) but got my hands on the 3rd edition today!  so now i need to study up and review.  yikes!

5.14.15 at 37 weeks

5.14.15 at 37 weeks

Mother's Day

Mother's Day was pretty great. I woke up to delicious breakfast in bed from my honey. Two plates of my favorite French toast with cream cheese, syrup, and berries. And then honey cleaned our entire kitchen. That may have been the best part. ; )  I sure do love a clean kitchen. It did make me feel like a horribly lazy wife though because he's cleaned our kitchen every day since he got home from his trip last Monday. And has fed himself/our kids/our whole family, at least half those nights. I'm big and pregnant and struggle to find the motivation to do anything other than lay in bed. Anyway, it was appreciated. Honey also got both kids ready for church while I showered. And he subbed Abigail's class during church. I had a great three hours of church, a wonderful time skyping with my family, a relaxing naptime reading Harry Potter, and a fun evening eating dinner and opening presents at my in laws. 

So the day was great and honey totally rocked it. But I will say, my kids didn't really do much of anything other than wish me happy Mother's Day and try to take my candy. 

Today though, they did their part. I woke up at 7:30 and, even though I was still so tired, I was too sick and congested to go back to sleep. So I read for a while and then at 9, put my head down to go back to sleep. And sleep I did. I heard abigail come downstairs at 10:15 with books in hand but when she saw I was asleep, she took them to the great room and read by herself on the sofa. I guess she was hungry though because I got a little tap tap tap on my shoulder with a "could you get me a bowl of cereal?" just 15 minutes later. 

So I started my day at 10:30, ate a bowl of cereal in bed, and then read a few books with abigail until I heard brady calling for me at11. Mother's Day part two?  I'll take it. Also, being sick while pregnant is so annoying. All I want is drugs but I never want to take anything. I guess I'll just keep lazing it in bed and blowing my nose every five seconds. 

Happy Monday! 

36 weeks

How far along:  36 weeks  (5.7.15)

Total weight gain/loss: 28 lbs

Maternity clothes:  yes... same as before.  i went to the temple tuesday.  if i go again before this baby is born then i will for sure need to rent a temple dress. i was thinking of renting one this time around, but i forgot until i was already in the dressing room and i didn't have any cash anyways and i wasn't sure if the temple took visa.  ; )  anyways, i looked absolutely ridiculous and my friends had a good laugh.  

Sleep:  not bad at all.  my dreams are really low key.  last night, i had a dream that i was at walmart and was trying to find all the stuff on my shopping list and was buying weird things like store bought beef jerky because ibotta was having $4 back rebates on stuff that only cost half that much.  

Best moment this week:  definitely monday night.  honey got back from his trip and we went out to dinner at carrabbas for our anniversary.  happy 8 years to us!  we talked about baby names and when we guessed the baby would come and he told me all about his trip and it was perfection.  i ordered the lobster ravioli, which was divine, and the waitress gave us a scoop of ice cream with caramel sauce and candied nuts with a candle on top.

Movement:  just holy cow, she never stops moving!  and it is intense!  lots of feet in the ribs and knees and elbows all over.  i won't lie... it's frequently uncomfortable and painful.  my doctor asked about her movement and i told her it never stopped and it was just constant jabbing and rolling and everything and she said that was great and a good sign of a healthy baby.  

Food cravings:  i'm not a huge fan of eating, but it isn't terrible.  i'm normally just not in the mood for anything and i get full really easily.  i still like chocolate chips though.  and scrambled eggs and egg salad sandwiches.  i've noticed that i have less of a tolerance for junk food and i feel gross when i eat it.  so if i have a morning with not a lot of nutritional value, by 3 o clock, i'm craving some squash or zucchini.  so basically, i'm kind of a picky eater again.  i picked going out to carrabbas solely because i wanted the lobster ravioli (and because i remember that christopher and i went there two years ago for our anniversary and it's the perfect environment for quiet conversation)... but i checked out the rest of the menu when i got there anyways and wouldn't you know, i had no interest in any other thing on the menu.  the plus side about getting full so easily was that after the initial bread (with olive oil and herbs and balsamic vinegar) and house salad, i really only needed to eat a small part of my entree (which is always a small serving anyway because it's lobster ravioli) before i was completely full.  so i got to bring home leftovers... which always makes me happy.  ; )

Symptoms: nausea and headache and backache and fatigue and lack of motivation and highs and lows of emotions and all of those sorts of things.  nothing that's getting in my way of life (except for all the bad days brought on by the pregnancy emotions... but i'm able to handle it better, knowing that it's just because i'm pregnant) so i'm still very much enjoying pregnancy.  several times this week, i've gotten lightheaded and sick like i'm about to pass out, but if i sit down and cool down (if i'm hot) then it goes away within a minute.  i feel really good so i'm still doing everything i normally would, but occasionally my body will really let me know that i need to slow down... and i'm not too proud to listen.

Gender:  i am happy to report that baby is still a girl!  and that we're getting super close to deciding on a name/nicknames/spelling... but as before, no official announcement til it's all set in stone on the birth papers.  i'm not a super decisive person so it's really not safe to go ahead monogramming anything right now.  ; )

What I miss:  fitting into my temple clothes... ; )  and having more control over my emotions and happiness.

Milestones:  i've got less than a month to go!
Theme: the week of ups and downs
What's different this time around:  with abigail, movement was slowing down... this time, not so much.  also, with abigail, i was getting comments about being pregnant with my third (because i was a nanny to two boys at the time) so this time it's actually cool that i AM super pregnant with my third.  dreams do come true! with brady, i was enjoying eating more than what i currently am.  but that makes sense because morning sickness during that pregnancy was a breeze... whereas i'm still getting it regularly in the evenings this time around.  

Extra:  i had an appointment on monday and met with my actual doctor, dr. walker.  i really like her.  she wasn't my doctor last time around, but she was the doctor on call that delivered brady.  she's always so nice and friendly and upbeat.  she brought in an ultrasound machine (i totally wasn't expecting this) and i told her i'd never had an ultrasound after the 20 week ultrasound with either of my previous pregnancies and she was blown away.  "how did they know if your baby was head down?!?!"  ha, i just shrugged.  anyways, she was happy to see that baby was nicely head down.  and i asked if she could confirm that baby was still a girl... which she did... and she is.  ; )  i asked her if i should take another hospital tour (they've been doing construction on the hospital so i wasn't sure how much is different now) and she said definitely yes because she's concerned about me getting to the hospital in time.  i told her i didn't waste time last time after i KNEW i was in labor and she said that i should come to the hospital this time around even if i just think i might be in labor.  i told her i would have a list of friends to call to watch my kids and she said it was fine if i needed to just bring my kids to the hospital with me.  i mean, hopefully my labor won't be any faster than it was with brady, but we're just trying to be prepared as best we can. she'd previously mentioned/asked about induction, but i told her i've only heard horror stories about it and wanted nothing to do with it.  luckily, she was really relieved and happy about that and fully supported my decision to wait for things to happen naturally.  everything at the appointment looked and measured and seemed to be just right so that's great.  i think i must be pretty straightforward as far as pregnant women go because she ended the appointment with an enthusiastic "i love pregnant women like you!"  ha.  

y'know who i wasn't as crazy about though? the nurse that was checking my blood pressure and everything.  she started out nice enough and was all "how're you feeling? great? that's good, you look good." and i was all "thanks, it's really fun to have a belly."  and she couldn't resist making a comment that was something like "well, it won't be fun for long" or something like that.  that has got to be by far my biggest pregnancy pet peeve... why do people insist on treating pregnancy like a horrible thing? or constantly feeling like they need to inform you of impending doom and gloom?  it drives me crazy.  pregnancy is such a crazy amazing miracle and there are a million and one women who have felt the intense sorrow of not being able to experience it.  so why would you say something as ungrateful and superficial as "it won't be fun for long" when you don't even know the whole story?!  either the lady is having a hard time and is already ungrateful for the aches and pains pregnancy brings and doesn't need you to add to it... or, she's glad for the experience and your comment will never apply to her.  i'll hop off my soapbox now, but come on, does anyone else feel the same way?

also, abigail is still dead set on naming our baby "vaseline" and we've been trying to be even more direct than before about how that will NOT be the name of her new baby sister.  she hasn't been very receptive to that though.  case in point... playing with her friends on wednesday afternoon, abigail suggested "vaseline!" as a name for whatever her friends were trying to name.  the 8 year old present was all "but isn't that a girl name? isn't that your baby sister's name?"  i about died.  apparently people are naming their kids such strange names these days that this 8 year old has no problem recognizing vaseline as an acceptable girl's name.

and, oh my goodness! i scheduled my last two appointments and my hospital tour (which i'm going on tonight) and i preregistered with the hospital and it's so crazy to me that this pregnancy is almost over!  yikes!  no!  i'm not ready to have three kids yet!  and ohheavensanewborn!  anyways, that's a little surreal to me.

and if i haven't mentioned it before, this is definitely the most nervous i've ever been about birthing a baby.  with abigail, i had a feeling i'd be late and that it would be a long and peaceful (epidural!) labor lasting roughly 24 hours.  i was late and, even though my labor was only 7 hours and my epidural didn't kick in til i was at a 10 and ready to push, it was pretty peaceful and all happened in good timing.  with brady, i was a little nervous (second labors are frequently half the length of time as the first) thinking i might have a 3.5 hour labor and i might go a few days early.  but hey, i'd practiced my hypnobirthing and surely everything would go pretty similarly to last time, right?  well, he was more than a week early, i was in denial about being in labor, and my contractions came on so fast each time that i would forget about my correct breathing until i was already hyperventilating.  my body was pushing while i was in the car on the way to the hospital, and it all happened so super fast.  after it was over, i was all "that couldn't have been more perfect!" but that's because i was already holding my healthy baby and everything was fine.  this time i'm all "oh my goodness what if this baby comes even sooner?" and "what if this baby comes even faster?" and "what if this labor doesn't go smoothly like my previous labors did?" and all of that sort of stuff.  i'm worried about knowing if i'm truly in labor, but i'm also worried that i'll show up to the hospital too early and there will be some complication or something and then there will be interventions and crap.  i'm not sure.  i just never was nervous for labor before but this time i totally am.  deeeep breaths.  and i'm still on hold at the library for that hypnobirthing book.  hopefully i can get a hold of it soon.

5.7.15 at 36 weeks

5.7.15 at 36 weeks

ps- sorry, i know the outfit sucks for really seeing the belly, but you get what you get.  i just snapped these as i ran out the door for my hospital tour.

pps- after two additional trips... walmart had baby hangers.  woohoo!

Crib climbing

Have I mentioned before how brady could totally climb out of his crib if he wanted to? This happened on April 28th and although he's done it since, he's never actually climbed out. I'm hoping he'll end up being like Abigail who was capable of climbing out (and even did on two or three occasions) but still was happy to be contained and sleep in her crib til she was three and a half. 

We shall see...

it's been 8 years

monday, we celebrated our 8th anniversary.  i can't believe it's already been 8 years!  that seems like so long and i feel like we just got married last spring.  honey even wrote in his card to me "I can't believe it's been 8 years already! (that is the right number, right?)" which i had to laugh at because a few years ago, he was off on his math on our anniversary card and thought we'd been married one less year than we had.  

it's true, our marriage just feels so fresh.

i gave honey a card (one that i'd saved and reused from our own wedding!) and a pack of chocolate twizzlers wrapped in heart ribbon.

honey gave me a card and a dozen roses.  it was perfection.

my favorite part of the day was that my honey was back from his trip... i was sooo excited just to see him and have him around.  we dropped the kids off with my mil and went to carrabbas.  it was so wonderful.  we sat in a quiet little booth and honey told me all about his trip (he took a weekend cruise with a bunch of guys) and it was amazing.  my honey isn't a super talkative guy, but he had plenty to tell me about this time and i was more than happy to listen.  when he says anything, i drop what i'm doing to listen... i love listening to him.  it was such a fun night.  i still feel like we're a young married couple so it's crazy to me that we're about to have our third kid.  that's nuts!

i love our comfortable our marriage is and how i feel like we're just on the same page.  i'm grateful that we get to go on trips together and that we're okay if one of us travels without the other.  i'm happy to stay home with the kids for several days while he goes off to do something fun and i know he's more than willing (and has in the past) to do the same for me.  i'm glad that when i have friends invite me to go to the temple with them with only a few hours notice, that i know i can text my honey and he'll make it happen and get home at whatever time he needs to so i can go with them.  and i love that even when i leave tons of toys and dishes all over that i'll come home to a clean house and an empty sink.  my honey is so good to me.  he was way out of my league when i met him, and he still is all these years later.  i'm so thankful i got someone so great.

My kids are trying to kill me

Oh my goodness, words can't express how much today sucked. Rest assured, there were some happy moments of today, but I'm practically positive that none of them included my kids. I used to like my kids. But lately? No. They are horrible. I mean, worse than horrible. I'm wondering if it's too late to back out of this whole parenthood thing. 

I spent 90% of church today trying to wipe my tears as discretely as possible. Have I told you lately how I haven't been enjoying my children? I was thiiiiis close to leaving church today (which I have never ever done) during sacrament meeting except that ishes bed my kids and run out without my purse. And I'd already been in and out at least six times and there was still at least twenty minutes late and I didn't want everyone to see my tear soaked eyes while I ran in to grab my purse and not return to church til next week. That is the only reason I stayed. Even though I told myself it was because I wanted to enjoy two hours to myself by staying at church and sending my kids to nursery and primary. Well jokes on me because brady threw too many fits and I literally was only away from him for the last twenty minutes of church. And that was because I took him to the nursery room and say "Bronwyn, I'm sorry if he screams, but I have to leave him here or I'm going to lose my marbles."  And what do us know, he didn't even cry. And he didn't even want to come home with me when I picked him up at the end. What the heck brady?!

But my real problem of the day (and most days, let's just be honest here) was Abigail. Which I won't even go into because my fingers would fall off from typing. I used to be obsessed with her when she was younger. If we were in a marriage relationship instead of a mother daughter relationship, I would be seeking out a divorce lawyer. Is there such thing as boarding school kindergarten? That offers a summer school option? That has immediate availability? I just keep talking to myself (because I'm going insane) and saying "I sure hope my mother hated me for the majority of my childhood" because that at least would give me hope for my future with Abigail. 

The plus side is that I've handled this all pretty well and haven't been a horrendous parent. Even if I do wish that someone would offer to adopt my children. 

Hallelujah that my honey gets back in town tomorrow. Hopefully I'm still alive then. 

When I got everything done

Today was extremely productive and holy cow am I beat! 

I started my day reading three conference talks on parenting/children. 

I got dressed and did my hair and makeup. 

I made chocolate chip waffles for the kids (pecan waffles for myself) with everything on top (whipped cream, powdered sugar, syrup, and fresh strawberries) and we all ate breakfast together so happily. It was delicious.

The kids played so well together listening to Aladdin music and then Magyar music while I unloaded the dishwasher, organized our cup cabinet, did the dishes, and cleaned up the kitchen a bit. 

I did three loads of laundry start to finish and there is nothing dirty in the house right now. Woohoo! 

I mowed the lawn, edged it, did some yard work, filled the giant blue trash can, swept out the garage, and even weeded some. 

Brady took a great nap while Abigail had quiet time. 

I showered! 

I cleaned the shower! Scrubbed the glass clean and super scrubbed the floor. I hate cleaning our shower floor. 

I put on sleeping beauty for Abigail and brady and baby girl's friend, Alice. Abigail loved that she got to have a friend over for a princess movie party. She wore her Ariel dress the whole day. 

I made Rice Krispie treats with the kids tonight while waiting for their oatmeal to cool down. And then, since I put some chocolate chips in there, they ate it super fast and got to have some Rice Krispie treat before bed. 

I vaccumed the upstairs. 

My kitchen is clean. Counters, dishes, floors...

Actually, the great room is clean and so are both kids bedrooms. 

I practiced the piano multiple times today. 

I didn't binge eat mass amounts of sugar in relation to parenting my children. I didn't horribly yell at them either. 

Holy cow I am exhausted. Also, my shooting back pain is getting worse. I'm wondering if it's tied to my physical activity like mowing the lawn and doing other yard work. 

According to the fatigue hitting my body, there's got to be other things I did today that I'm forgetting right now. But holy cow it feels good to have that stuff done. I love when the kids have closets full of clean clothes and that I have fresh sheets on my bed that is made soooo perfectly right now. 

Saturday is a special day... It's the day we get ready for suuuunday. 

Someone give me a pat on the back for this... And then just keep patting... With both hands... and massage my muscles a bit while you're at it. 

k, thanks.

brady eats

as i mentioned in the chick fil a post... i'm obsessed with brady's little toddler fingers and how they hold food and drinks and stuff.  so here's a million pictures of brady eating an egg salad sandwich during our driveway picnic lunch.  

and how precious is this picture?  except that the kids were supposed to be getting ready for bed and abigail turned into a melting pot of disaster.  and i had to tell her to "just turn out your light and lay on your pillow and i'll come up to check on you in a bit" because she was so out of control that we couldn't even handle our usual bedtime routine.  that's what she's like when i don't have her do at least an hour of quiet time in the afternoon so really, it's my fault.  but anyways, this was a sweet and precious moment in time.  both shirtless, distracted from their current job of "put your clothes away and get your pj's on!" and well into the "ooo let's read this book even though we're topless."

so while abigail was upstairs calming down (she was waiting for me to check on her while i was waiting for her to fall asleep), i took brady into my room and shut the door.  he has this thing with putting on the soft socks i keep in my nightstand.  he sure knows how to pose for the camera, huh?  ; )

i told him to take out his binky and he did better like that.

he's such a funny boy.  i love this age.

graduation day and chick fil a

abigail graduated preschool!

ms. heather's class

 to celebrate/mourn our last morning alone together... brady and i went on a little date to chick fil a.  also, it was the last day of the month and i needed to claim my april freebie lemonade slush thing.  ; )

brady played while i texted honey... because he was in texas, about to leave on the cruise.  and i was already missing him fiercely.

i'm normally not very good at sharing, but i figured if we were on a date, i really needed to.

and i don't know what it is, but i am obsessed with brady's little pudgy baby fingers when they hold his drinks.  weird, i know, but i can't deny it.  it's the best.

which is why i took a million pictures of it.  also, brady opened this tiny little container of cheerios and was all "ah! donuts!"  i tried to tell him they were cheerios, but he insisted they were donuts.  since then, he's also referred to several other things as donuts... like a lifesaver candies and fruit loops.  if it's a donut shape, it's a donut.

we met up with my mil at abigail's graduation (i invited her since honey was gone... and she also invited my fil who arrived a little bit later.  i was glad abigail had some attendance to make it feel special) and it was really cute.  they had a little procession.

they did a pledge of allegiance, a bell chime to the abc song, poems on the flannel board, and handing out diplomas... and tossing hats.

it was really cute.  then we all loaded up on tons and tons of candy and otter pops and cupcakes and capri suns and hung out in the sun and had a good time.  i'm glad abigail was able to go to preschool this year.  i'm pretty sure she learned next to nothing (except how to say "easy peasy lemon squeezy!"), but she looooooved it to death.  hopefully she won't be too bored with me this summer while she waits for kindergarten!

35 weeks

How far along:  35 weeks  (4.30.15)

Total weight gain/loss: umm, 27-28 lbs... sometimes i wish i cared.  but then i remember how stressful my last pregnancies were when i cared and i'm glad that this time, i'm just fat and happy.

Maternity clothes:  yes... and i like them.  i rotate through three pairs of jeans (paris blues, red blue cheap ross jeans, and my favorite maternity skinnies from last pregnancy) and the several maxi skirts i have.  i love dressing my bump and i love when people tell me i look cute.  being pregnant is so fun.  it makes me feel so special. 

Sleep:  it's been steadily improving the past few weeks.  my dreams are consistently normal and basic, i'm able to fall asleep just fine (as long as i've taken my sleeping pill... without it, i'll lay awake indefinitely), my body is comfortable, and i can, for the most part, sleep uninterrupted until 7:30 or 8.  i'm sure soon enough that i'll start waking up during the night to go to the bathroom (occasionally i will get up to use the bathroom when chris is getting up and showering and everything), but until then, i'll just enjoy what i've got going.  this is probably the best i've slept all pregnancy since the crazy dreams have finally subsided.  

Best moment this week:  maybe my parents making it home safely from nepal after the earthquake?  ; )  or tuesday night.  honey came home and grilled dinner for us.  i made the our best bites recipe for grilled stuffed zucchini and we also had hotdogs.  we downed so much food and it was delicious.  we were all happy and gathered around the table for a delicious dinner.  and honey got up from the table and started cleaning everything up and i helped him while our kids played and danced in the great room and it was just one of those nights where everything flowed so nicely.  perfect to have that night together before all of his upcoming travel. 

Movement:  man, this has really been kicked up a notch this week!  it is constant and powerful and obvious.  even as i type this, my stomach is shifting all over the place.  several times this week, i've had my arm semi propped on my belly as i'm reading something on my phone and my belly is moving so much, it's as if my phone is going to get sea sick from all the rocking.  it kind of makes it tricky to read such a small screen!  also, the kicking in my ribs is even more painful and uncomfortable.  all of it has been really really obvious and in your face compared to the previous weeks.  

Food cravings:  i like eating.  i wish i wasn't so lazy about making stuff though.  things i've enjoyed this week have been hummus with red bell peppers, that grilled stuffed zucchini (a lot!), and chocolate chips.  when i think of chocolate chips, i pretty much want them right away.  i also have had a strong urge for oreos anytime i see or hear them mentioned (for example, some article online went viral about a colorado mom that sent oreos to school in her kid's lunch and they got taken away by a teacher) and want them sooo bad, but i don't have any oreos around so i don't know if they would hit the spot as well as i imagine them.  last night i had kettle corn which i usually love, but it just wasn't doing it for me.  oooo, i've also really been liking my chocolate peanut butter smoothies (i know i eat like crap, but i do add spinach and baby carrots to these).  oh, and maybe it was from the week before, but mmm, i made some banana muffins that were to die for and i've been really wanting more of those.  i've noticed that i eat in the afternoon to help myself stay awake, but a lot of it is crappy junk food or candy and it makes me feel sick.  i have a lower tolerance for junk it seems.  i've really been loving fresh veggies though.  squash and zucchini with plenty of butter and salt and pepper?  yes please... i'll take the whole pan.  also, the watermelon juice slushie (just blended up frozen watermelon) i made for the kids the other day was oddly satisfying. it tasted extra extra good.  

Symptoms: nausea, headaches, depression, fatigue, and back pain (the sharp kind on my right side) that may or may not be related to pregnancy.  

Gender:  i'm so excited for this little girl. having abigail and brady who are so different in personality and appearance, i'm just curious what's in the works with this kid!

What I miss:  not feeling so elderly.  this past week, it's like my body has suddenly started to seem pregnant.  i don't feel uncomfortable at all, but there are times that i go to lean over to reach something or pick brady up and i realize that my stomach is literally too big to allow me to accomplish what i'm trying to do.  like i'm just a few inches short of reaching what i want, because when i'm sitting on the floor and trying to grab brady's pants, my belly just gets in the way and i have to scoot my whole body closer to get my finger tips on them.  or like how i took the kids in the yard yesterday so they could play while i did yardwork.  this is normally something pretty easy for me and something i enjoy doing and after a few hours, i always feel really accomplished.  well, i literally lasted 32 minutes (according to the texts on my phone) before i felt like i was about to pass out.  i mean, sweating, spinning head, trouble breathing, lightheaded, nauseous like i was about to throw up, seeing spots, unsteady on my feet... the whole shebang.  i seriously got next to nothing done because even in that half hour, i was moving slower than molasses.  but what really made me feel old and decrepit... when i couldn't get off of the toilet the other day after i went to the bathroom.  it literally took me three or four tries (and almost falling down during my failed attempts) before i could stand up.  although, that was from the shooting back pain that caused me to collapse once i got to a certain point each time.  maybe it wasn't even pregnancy related... but on top of everything else, i'm definitely feeling like my body has its limitations.

Milestones:  i hit the 35/35 where i'm 35 weeks pregnant and only have 35 days to go!
Theme: the week of telling people i'm due in a month.  seriously, i'm constantly getting asked when i'm due.  i won't lie though... i like it.
What's different this time around:  with abigail, i still had 40 more days of being pregnant... with brady only 24.  yikes!  i wonder how much longer i have with this one!

Extra:  i'm a little worried about the timing of when this kid is going to come.  i mean, we should be good since honey doesn't have any travel scheduled in the three weeks before i'm due (have i mentioned before that he was supposed to go out of town december 19th last time and brady was born on the 18th?), but still, i worry.  i worry about getting to the hospital in time and i just worry about how everything will play out.  i still need to schedule a hospital tour (i took one last time and it's the only reason that brady wasn't born in the parking lot), because even though it's the same hospital as last time, they've done a lot of work on it and it's still undergoing a lot of construction, so i really want to know the specifics on where to park/valet the car, check in, etc.  

also, i haven't done any practicing on my pain management breathing techniques for labor or delivery so i'm feeling maybe i need to get on that... stat.  

but seriously, when i was pregnant with abigail, i was so sure i'd go a week late, and everything followed my plan and it was great.  with brady, i was pretty confident that i would at least hit my due date or be very close... and that isn't how it went down.  this time, i know going early is a possibility, so i have the added awesomeness of being able to worry about being unprepared and rushed to get to the hospital.  what if i'm at walmart and i start getting contractions and i have to hurry home to get my bag packed (let's be honest, i'm going to want my straightener and hair brush in there and i'm not going to keep all of that in my car) and i won't be able to take a shower or get ready before i go.  i know all of this doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things (unless my baby ends up being born in a car or something) but i can't help thinking about it.

i got out all the baby stuff and was putting it away in the dresser in the guest room when i remembered my aversion to having clothes in a dresser (abigail is the only one in this family with a dresser... and it only holds a small portion of her clothes... several drawers are completely empty) and decided i needed to buy a hundred baby hangers.  well, of course when i went to walmart, they were 100% out of baby hangers.  annoying.  so the clothes are currently all sprawled all over the guest room and it is complete chaos.  i'm going to go back to walmart tomorrow and hopefully they'll have an abundance of hangers.

4.30.15 at 35 weeks

4.30.15 at 35 weeks

Life while pregnant

Here's a bit of my day today. 

After our morning bowls of cereal, Abigail climbed in bed with me to read. Our current book is James and the giant peach. Something made her think of her birthday, so she asked me for the millionth time (since she turned four) how many days there were until her birthday. I normally just estimate, but this time I asked Google to help me. Only 76 days left? Abigail was very impressed. 

Our library doesn't have a James and the giant peach picture book (I was hoping Abigail could look at those pictures while I read from the chapter book), so I periodically recap what's happening and sometimes Google an illustration or two. I swear my phone sometimes helps me parent better. Sometimes. 

I tried to do yard work this morning while the kids played. I got maybe 20 or 30 minutes into it (moving slowly and not getting a lot done) before I was having trouble breathing and I was seeing spots and feeling super nauseous and lightheaded. Apparently it's not a good idea to do yard work in the heat at 35 weeks pregnant. So I took the kids to jodi's and we hung out on her lawn while all the kids played (she was watching the smith kids all day) 

We came home and had a picnic lunch and nap/quiet time. Then Abigail went to play at Lucy's and eventually Brady woke up from nap and we played outside. Abigail came home and I took the kids upstairs for bath and pjs. And then, just to be crazy, we decided to have a frozen movie party. 

And I cleaned the kitchen and did a load of laundry. 

But man, my body is feeling pregnant. Or maybe just aged and disabled. Same thing? 

Its blowin' up

It like my belly is an inflatable balloon and someone keeps blowing it up. It's mostly the size of one of those huge balloons with a rubber band attached that makes drum noises though. Seriously. And I still have at least a month to grow. I mean, go. At least a month to go.