poor Andrew

Andrew didn't feel well today so we had a lot of snuggling and a doctor appointment.  

honey is out of town so we went to school spirit night at chick fil a.  Andrew's food of choice was strawberry jelly on a saltine cracker.

Andrew is 9 months!

andrew is 9 months old!

Abigail actually woke up and came to me this morning to get started on getting ready for school. this is a MIRACLE and happens once in a blue moon and it just was such an amazing surprise and set an awesome tone for the day.  I helped her get ready and she was able to walk to school with the neighbor kids.

Brady is really into money and having money and earning money and spending money and learning about money.  I need to compile a list of things that he can do to earn money but the tricky part is that I want it to actually be helpful to me.  not just a busy job that creates more work for me.  the only job I currently have for him to help with (besides laundry, which he does not get paid for) is unloading the dishwasher.  his job is to put away everything he can reach... the rest of the things, he has to stack and group for me to put away in the up high places.  I love this because it's such a time saver for me and mostly because I don't have to do any bending over (my back has been so annoying lately) to get stuff out of the dishwasher OR to put it away in low places.  we only run our dishwasher every couple of days and Brady is so excited when he can unload it.  he gets 25 cents for a job well done.

a little after nine, I dropped Elizabeth and Brady off for a playdate with this older lady in the ward.  she watches her granddaughter turning the week until 4pm and has started inviting the kids over for playdates so her granddaughter can have more friends.  it's a win win for everyone involved.  hopefully we can return the favor and have Lillien over sometime.

in the elevator heading up for Andrew's 9 month well check, I looked at my watch and saw that we were perfectly a few minutes early for our appointment and it made me feel so accomplished.  someday, I hope to be so punctual that being on time no longer feels like such a huge success.  until then, I'm just going to love my successes whenever I can get them!

we had a great appointment.  we met with a PA that we'd never seen before.  our doctor that we've had since moving here recently relocated to Indiana and I don't love our new doctor.  she was a little too concerned about Andrew's weight at his 6 month appointment and honestly, it got me stressed enough that I thought I would have to quit nursing. so even though the doctor was not at fault, I wasn't super intent on seeing her for this appointment... I just chose the time slot that was most convenient for me.  I liked the PA that we saw.  she was polite and friendly and asked all the important questions about how Andrew is doing and said that Andrew was growing on his own curve and looks to be just fine.  he did a great job and was so content and cooperative.

my guess is that Andrew's weight would have been closer to 13lbs 13ozs if he hadn't refused to eat before the appointment.  he ate at 4:30am but then wouldn't eat after he was awake for the day.  he actually wouldn't eat until after the appointment when we were in the room waiting for the nurse to come with his shots.  the paper doesn't get that specific, but I think I heard the doctor say that he was .03% when we were reviewing his chart.  he's just a real skinny little guy.

also, I was amazed that he got four shots and stopped crying the second I picked him up.  I think that's a record for the fastest time for any of my kids to stop crying after getting shots. and he actually cuddled with me.  it was amazing.

so then we stopped by the library to get a bunch of books on hold (Abigail is doing a little project at school on Helen Keller) and then to Safeway to get milk (but they had a limit of 2 on the sale price... who does that?!) and somehow also walked out with four packages of various kinds of Oreos (it's a bad idea to go shopping when you're hungry) and I'm super excited about all of them.  I got mint, coconut thins, golden, and regular.  I opened mint in the car and they were delightful.

we went straight to get Elizabeth and Brady who were loving life with Gayle and Lillien because they were playing play dough, had balloons, had done a variety of st. Patricks days crafts (including making a necklace of fruit loops) and also got sent home with a pack of skittles aka rainbow seeds.

we went straight to school for Brady's parent teacher conference and it went great.  the teacher actually apologized that she didn't really have anything to tell me.  "he's doing really great and it's not like we had any concerns before or anything..."  ha.  but it's really great that she said he's come a long way in the classroom, socially.  he's much more outgoing with friends and able to resolve conflict whereas before he would have just conceded and walked away.  her one suggestion is that he work on becoming more of a creative open thinker because he's so literal and so by the books.  but I already knew all of that.  ; )

we had lunch, quiet time, Abigail walked home from school, we all watched a 30 minute movie on Helen Keller, and I got ready to go to the temple with friends from relief society.  didn't make it to the gym but it was a successful and fulfilling day.

two kinds of sick

when it comes to kids, I feel like there's really just two kinds of sick. the kind of sick that makes them easier, and the kind of sick that makes them more difficult.

I mean, most people are familiar with how kids are crankier or up at night or crying a lot when they don't feel well, but we don't as often get to experience some of those most prime experiences of parenting when the sick kid is just calm and humble and sleepy and cuddly.  that's how Abigail was earlier this year when I had to take her to the ER for what we thought was appendicitis.  it also makes me think of one time when Abigail was little (she's never been cuddly) and she climbed in my lap and fell asleep on me while I was watching general conference or something.  both times were so obvious.

last night though, I chalked it up to Andrew just being really tired and worn out from being awake for the whole ward Christmas party.  he fell asleep with no problem without a binky (normally he falls asleep with a binky for daytime naps but not during any night wakings) and just seemed soooo extra calm.  during the night, he slept for extra long and I even heard him cry a bit up settle himself back to sleep which isn't terribly common.  I thought maybe something might be up but he's typically just an easy going baby so it wasn't a dramatic difference from his norm.  but make no mistake, he's got his first stomach bug.  he threw up once during the night and then first thing in the morning before I got him up.  then he threw up when I was about to put him down for nap (standing on exact spot of crunchy carpet that is left from when Elizabeth threw up there on Wednesday) and it luckily was all contained on the two of us and my bathroom sink (since I sprinted there).  then I got him all changed and cleaned up and reswaddled and was standing in Chris's office about to put him down for nap and it happened AGAIN and luckily I made it to my bathroom sink again and so neither of us got messy at all.  so third time was the charm... I finally put Andrew down and he instantly fell asleep without a binky and without a peep.

so we'll see how the next 24 hours play out.  I'm hoping it can all get out of his system today since tomorrow is Brady's birthday.  cross your fingers for that one!  in the mean time, my biggest goals and accomplishments revolve around keeping vomit out of our carpet* and preferably in a sink.

*on Tuesday night/wednesday morning, Elizabeth was throwing up in her crib.  upon waking for the day, I knew she was still sick, even though she was acting mostly normal.  but that's a hard combo... to have a mobile playing kid that could throw up at any moment.  it's not like she was laying on the sofa for hours on end where I could just surround her with towels and blankets.  I left her in the kitchen while I went to chris's office (we have Andrew's little travel bed in there for the time being) to put Andrew down for a nap and Elizabeth came in fussing and crying and I couldn't understand what she was saying until she started burping and looking like she was about to throw up.  but at that point, what could I do with a nursing baby in my arms?!  so, we have a big patch of crusty carpet still. and that's exactly where I was standing (about to put Andrew down for a nap) when he started burping and I sprinted to the hardwood and then again to my bathroom sink.  and then SOMEHOW it happened the next time I went to put him down again... standing on that very spot and hearing the burping start.  so I'm starting to wonder if that spot is cursed.  seriously... what're the odds?

7 year well check

Abigail had her 7 year well check this afternoon.  honey came home from work early so he could watch Brady and Elizabeth and I didn't have to take all four kids.  moments with less kids really let me appreciate the time to observe a child as an individual.  I loved just sitting and watching Abigail read.  I had no idea how much she moves while she reads.  also, I gave her silly putty a few days ago to have while she reads (as sort of a fidget thing) and she took it to church on Sunday (without my knowledge until I saw it during sacrament meeting) because she felt like she needed it.  so, since then, I've let her have it as much as she wants, even at meals.  I won't lie, it's going far better than I'd anticipated.

Abigail's stats:
height 3'11"  32%
weight 41 lbs 11.2 oz  9%
bmi 13.27  3%

she fell off the chair AS this picture was being taken which was AS our doctor was walking back in the door with paperwork.  of course she tumbled down to the ground and was all "I'M FINE!"  that's her phrase.  I'm thinking about pre-ordering her tombstone and having it say something clever with "I'M FINE!" on it.

this kid.  who just blends into the woodwork sometimes but holy cow Andrew, we are SO thankful you are such an easy going fourth child.

I'm not sure who did this and I don't even really care.  it was definitely one of my kids and I can't even blame them.  it's my fault.  it's in their genes.

count your blessings

I know I suck at blogging.  I'm too busy and too tired.  but mostly, it's because I don't have a blogging app on my phone so I can't throw up a quick post while I'm waiting for my oven to preheat or something.

BUT I got out my laptop just for this so hopefully I can express my gratitude in the few minutes I have before I start nodding off and falling asleep.

this morning, Abigail seemed a little sensitive and out of sorts but nothing that created a red flag for me... she's a sensitive sort of girl in general.  then all of the sudden she started crying like crazy and clutching her stomach and telling me that her stomach hurt and it hurt to breathe.  those few minutes passed but then a little while later, it happened again.  and then it kept happening for several hours... these waves of pain would just suddenly wash over her and she was clutching her belly, doubled over in pain, and telling me through crazy tears what pain she was in.  even when these episodes of pain weren't happening, she was obviously still in pain from her stomach.  she wouldn't talk or say anything and was sniffly and sad.  I'd taken all the kids with me to Costco and she actually rode in the top child seat next to Elizabeth because she was too uncomfortable to stand or walk.  and I know I sound like a horrible mom for taking her to Costco during all of this, but it was so weird and came on so suddenly that I kind of just kept expecting it to disappear at any second.  but it didn't.  most of the way through our Costco trip (and you better believe, I've never shopped at Costco so fast, ever),  I decided that there was no chance we'd make it to sprouts so I grabbed a few produce things from Costco and hurried home.  on the way I called my mom about it (like fifty times... eventually she called me back and the first thing I said was "don't worry... no one died.") and she said I should take Abigail to the doctor to rule everything out.

getting home, I unloaded groceries and made a sandwich for Elizabeth and Brady for lunch since it was noon.  Abigail had gone straight inside and I assumed she'd gone up to her room to rest in bed and read a book.  once I put out food for Brady and Elizabeth, I went upstairs to check on Abigail... expect that I actually found her on the stairs.  asleep.  she'd made it up about three stairs and just parked herself right there for a snooze.  well, probably she was just resting and then accidentally fell asleep.  so I helped her up to bed where she could actually sleep.  then I got Brady up for quiet time and Elizabeth down for nap.  finally around 12:30, I was able to call kaiser to schedule an appointment for Abigail.  they said she could be seen at 1:30.  

at noon

12:15pm

12:45pm

I spent the next half hour trying to figure out childcare for Brady and Elizabeth which was trickier than it should have been because people were busy running errands and stuff.  eventually, I got a hold of Janel's husband and he brought his daughter over to the house to sit with the kids.  at one, I took Abigail and Andrew with me to the doctor's office to have Abigail checked out.  our doctor couldn't say for sure one way or the other about appendicitis and said we should go to the ER.  half an hour later, we showed up at children's hospital and Abigail cried and begged me to take her home so she could rest in bed.  she was just so tired.  I mean, even at the doctor's office, she'd been laying down and falling asleep during the appointment.  and crying as she told the doctor that it only hurt a little.  I think she must have been comparing it to what it was like during one of the painful episodes.

anyway, we got in to be seen at the hospital and they were worried about appendicitis.  they did a long ultrasound while Abigail watched pj masks on the tv in the room.  then they wanted to do blood work and the guy came in and turned on Moana and got some blood.  we watched the entire Moana movie.  I think it was an hour and a half.  other people came in and out, but the whole hospital experience was a lot of waiting. every time we talked to someone, they were concerned about appendicitis.  looking at it online, Abigail had all the symptoms, and when the doctors pressed in certain places and asked if it hurt, she was answering all the things that pointed to appendicitis.  EVERYTHING pointed to appendicitis and I prayed that wouldn't be what was wrong with her.  she described the pain as coming in different places during the different episodes and even not during the episodes of pain.  sometimes high or low or left or right and sometimes just a general pain all over.  they had her use to her finger and told her she had to just use one finger to point to where the pain was.  she pointed to her belly button.  I was relieved that she wasn't pointing to her lower right abdomen where the appendix is... until I looked online to find that pain around your belly button wasn't good.  ugh.  I told our main doctor that I felt like Abigail was improving a lot because she hadn't had one of those episodes of pain in over two hours (it was 3pm at the time) and that her fever was going down (it had been 102.2 just before 1pm) and she said that actually that worried her because those things described what would be the case if an appendix had already burst.  seriously, nothing was looking promising and I was trying to brace myself for bad news.  google told me best case scenario hospital stay for appendicitis was a few days and if it had already burst, it was more like 8 days. no one has time for that.  also, I was nearly in tears every time I watched Abigail writhe in pain and clutch her belly and cry while she curled up in the fetal position.  it was a little hard to take.  what wasn't hard to take was that she was so well behaved.  so polite and zero sass.  it brought out all of my compassion for this little girl that looked so broken.

in the car, she'd been crying that she was too sleepy and wanted to go home to rest in a bed.  I told her the hospital would have a bed for her to sleep in.  I know she didn't believe me.  but you better believe when I told her she could lay down on this bed, she crawled right up and fell asleep.  

hallelujah for nursing... I wasn't planning on being gone for seven hours and was glad, as always, to know that I had plenty of food on hand (on chest... sorry, couldn't resist the cheesy joke) for Andrew.

she was too tired and in too much pain to walk so the nurse carried Andrew's carseat while I carried Abigail to and from the ultrasound room.

watching pj masks.

always curled up in fetal position

thank goodness for this guy's easygoing nature.  with the exception of when I took him out to nurse him for ten minutes, he was in his carseat from 10am (when we went to Costco) until 7:30pm when we returned home.  he just slept and hung out.

watching Moana

the internet wasn't giving me much hope.  but then again, neither were any of the doctors.  thank goodness for this little miracle that nothing was truly wrong with Abigail.

eventually, a new doctor came in with our regular doctor and said that the ultrasound results looked really positive... they could see her appendix! woohoo!  but her bloodworm came back that there was definitely some sort of infection going on (which would explain the fever that she'd had... even though it was coming down in the past couple hours).  he asked Abigail about her appetite... "what's your favorite food?" [sad, crying mumbles from Abigail]... repeat question and answer again.  then he was all "what? shrimp?" ha.  "if I had a big plate of shrimp right here, would you want to eat it?" haha.  she said yes but stated for the fiftieth time that actually she was just sooo thirsty.  they gave her a zofran and then ten or fifteen minutes later gave her Motrin and gatorade that she could have one tablespoon of every five minutes.  then our main doctor came in again and asked her more questions (I mean, a million people did over those several hours we were there... so many people and so many questions) and said that she could have apple juice and didn't need to measure her fluids anymore.  it was an amazing transformation.  within a half hour of getting those meds, she was acting like her usual self.  well, almost.  she was still really polite but she was also chatty and actually standing up and walking around!  the final diagnosis guess was that she had some sort of viral infection that was causing severe abdominal cramping.  so the zofran and painkiller took care of the nausea and fever and basically the girl was healed.  I was so glad to be walking out of there with a daughter who was yapping away about who knows what instead of the lifeless daughter I'd walked in with. the daughter that kept falling asleep four seconds after she put her head down and feet up.  hallelujah.

kambryn had watched the kids until five when I had Sarah come over to drop off Jane and take kambryn home for me.  I'm so thankful for good friends that are so willing to help me out and lend their daughters.  I mean, they offered to do so much more, but really, the daughters were the best and it eased my mind that I knew my kids were just fine playing at home until Christopher could get there at 6.  Abigail and Andrew and I got home around 7:30 and Abigail was acting 99% normal.  I have a feeling that Christopher probably thinks this ER trip (and bill) was a little unnecessary, but honestly, if I were him, I probably would think so too. such a transformation.  what a precious miracle for us... even when I was so lacking in faith.

so here I am, just nodding off right now, but hoping to capture this little story.  my heart is full of gratitude to have all four of my kids, happy and healthy and peacefully sleeping in their own little beds tonight.

man, it's been a long day.

4 year well check

We just finally got around to Abigail's four year well check on Wednesday. All went well except that the doctor was concerned that baby girl's height percentiles have been dropping so significantly the past two years. So she ordered some blood tests. Good news is that baby girl handled it like a champ and that I just got the results back and they're all normal.

Playing hide and seek.

Waiting to get her blood drawn. Brady was climbing on one chair and Abigail on the other and somehow they both fell off within literally two seconds of one another. Brady was just spooked so his crying didn't last long. Abigail actually hurt her leg so that crying continued until a nurse came and put a bandaid on her to ease her pain. Why are band aids a cure all for kids?!  Anyway, it amused me that she wasn't at all phased when a nurse was literally probing a needle all around under her skin looking for a vein but that the part of the experience that made her cry was that she fell off the chair before anything even happened.

And just for fun... I can't believe how much more grown up she looks than just a year ago! Her hair is finally growing! 

This picture is like a time warp for me that it really feels like it was just last month. I can't wrap my head around it. Holy cow.... My little baby girl. 

8.6.14

31 lbs 6.4 ozs   18%

3' 3.25"   37%

bmi 14.33   18%

this girl is into princesses and anything girly, playing with friends, and being a big kid.  

It never ends

Last night I stayed up way too late wasting time online when I should have put myself to sleep hours earlier. I couldn't help but keep looking out the window at a whole lot of white.  So because I'm still like a little kid about snow, before I closed my eyes for the night, I thought I'd hop out of bed and tiptoe to the front door to see how much had fallen. It was gorgeous. Also, I didn't even know we were supposed to be getting snow... And multiple inches at that!

Anyways, our bedroom is on the main floor and as I walked past the base of the stairs I could have sworn I smelled nasty sickness. So I ran upstairs and poked my nose in where the kids were sleeping. Sure enough... Disgustingness. Thinking Brady must have pooped and had another gross blowout before bed, I contemplated waking him up for a fresh diaper. But then I realized, the smell wasn't coming from his bum... It was his head!  

So there he was, sound asleep, head buried in a pool of vomit. What's the protocol in that situation?  I seriously was just standing there in this vomit smelling fog, weighing the pros and cons of waking him up or letting him sleep. I chose to let him sleep so he could wake on his own. Then I could give him a bath in the middle of the night or whenever he woke up and put him back to sleep til morning. 

Well, he didn't wake up til 5:45 and it took long enough to clean up his crib and his clothes and give him a bath a put a little food in his tummy... That kid is up for the day and so am I. Honestly, I would have anticipated it being worse but the time has flown by and it's already the time I would normally wake up for the day. Now I'm just trying to figure out what the heck to do for nap... For Brady. Surprisingly, I feel fine. And it's been fun to hang out with honey before work. 

But can someone please tell me what is going on with my kid?!  He's had weird stomach issues and gross diapers/diaper rash off and on for the past month. Literally I think it was February 5th when this all started when he woke up with vomit in his crib. It only lasted two days last time so hopefully it'll be quick this time too. Especially since he already threw up yesterday while he was eating and that would make us half way through by now! Anyone?  The only thing I can think of is teething... But it's been going on a month and I see zero new teeth. A week ago, his doctor says she just thinks it's GI stuff and to keep an eye on it. I'll have to email her again and see if she has anything new to say...

edited to add: umm two hours later i picked up the crying kid and saw something in the back of his mouth.  thinking it was something inedible, i checked it out.  ummm, it's a molar.  i had only been checking frint and center, just assuming the next tooth would be on the bottom since he's got four on top and two underneath.  i didnt have molars on my radar at allllll.  mom fail.

also, it's 5:18 amd he's been napping since 11:10.  this has got to be a record.  i'm not sure that abigail even ever took a six plus hour nap.  sleep it off brady... you need it.  

we're that family now with a whole lot of sick

poor brady.  poor all of us actually.

last week, brady was fussy... i was thinking it was teething.  he also had a diaper rash so raw and terrible and bloody.  thursday morning, he woke up with a crib full of vomit.  and puked a little during his afternoon nap, just for good measure.  but then seemed fine.  friday though, he woke up again with a whole crib full of vomit.  what the heck brady?!  saturday, you could tell he was drooling and had a runny nose.  he wasn't a really happy guy.  sunday morning, he woke up with this horrible (but really cute in a sad sort of way) barking cough.  i told christopher it was like he was darth vader* because when i went to get him up, it was super dark in the room, and the fan was still on really loud, and yet i could still hear this deep darth vader sort of... i dunno... breathing?  sighing?  huffing?  something.  and don't even get me started on how bad his nose was.  so much snot.  such a sad brady.  anyways, he's still got it.  and he coughs all night long.  and even his talking and crying during the day is low and manly.  even more manly than usual.

and poor me because i felt super sick going to bed friday night and finally threw up at 5am saturday morning.  not sure why my body hates me... why do i feel like i'm always throwing up?  i don't even get the benefit of being pregnant.  i'm just throwing up with zero benefit.  who invented this crap?!  anyways, somehow, while i was throwing up, i also threw out my neck.  like i have never ever ever had such extreme neck pain ever.  there is sleeping on it wrong and having neck pain for a few days sort of pain and then there's multiplying that by a thousand and that's what i was experiencing.  i laid in bed and then seriously couldn't move.  i can't even begin to describe it.  and all day saturday i basically had to lay in bed.  the pain was so severe that it also imparied my ability to use my arms (because shoulder muscles connect to neck muscles blah blah blah) so i couldn't hold my kid, i almost killed myself putting a shirt on, i couldn't brush my hair, and i couldn't reach anything that was higher than my head because i literally didn't have the ability to lift my arm that high.  that means i had to have christopher reach the oats and flax seed and brown sugar from the top shelf just so i could make myself a simple bowl of oatmeal.  and moving at all hurt.  not moving also hurt.  laying hurt.  deep breaths hurt. swallowing even kind of hurt.  it's late monday night and i'm still having terrible pain.  although thankfully by sunday morning i could at least function.  i kept thinking how grateful i was that it happened on a saturday when i had my honey home to help.  if it was a weekday i for sure would have had to call a friend to take my kids for 8 hours until christopher could get home.  has anyone else experienced this?!  why does my neck still hurt so bad?!  and i didn't even feel anything at the time...  i was just laying in bed feeling like i was going to vomit, i finally got up and went to the bathroom for the inevitable, and when i laid back down to go to sleep... searing pain.  anyways, i was also still feeling weak and crappy from throwing up and by saturday night i was also getting a sore throat.  monday morning i woke up feeling terrible... congestion and headache.  body, come on!

christopher?  well he started getting a sore throat saturday night too.  sunday morning woke up definitely sick.  and monday he said was absolutely miserable like he wanted to die.  and he had a million meetings all day and combine that with traveling and i just feel really bad for him.

abigail?  she's just a bundle of non-sick energy suffering from a lack of attention and playdates.  but mostly playdates.  the most social girl (i just mistyped "gift"... freud would say that's because i'm a loving mother... freud doesn't know i started my kids' bedtime routine tonight in the 6 o clock hour tonight because i just needed them asleeeeeeeep) in the world can't take two seconds without a friend elle and so she is struggling.  luckily though, she's not actually sick.  just inflicting her high energy on the rest of us.  but we do love her anyways.  also, she woke up at 7:30 this morning and i wanted to die.  luckily though, she was as sweet and delightful as could be (until maybe 4:00 or something when brady woke up from his nap) and i didn't have to pull myself from bed until after 9.  she woke up and played and then went potty and got herself dressed again (although she brought me her pj's to untangle) and then put a sticker on her potty chart and got herself a treat (and then brought me the ziploc bag so i could seal it again) and even returned the chair (because the treats are kept in a higher cabinet so she has to push a chair over and then climb on the counter and stand up to reach them) back to the table.  if it wasn't so creepy, i would install cameras in all parts of my house to record this sort of stuff.

anyways, somehow, i survive without my honey... one day at a time.

but let's cross our fingers for the boys of the family... they're just real sick.

brady at one

12.19.14

18 lbs 6 ozs   11%

2' 6"   56%

hc 17.52"   12%

the inevitable

is life in fast forward?!  how is it already thursday?!  seriously i feel like just this morning i was comforting a crying abigail because she was sick and we had to stay home from church.  well, both kids are just as sick as ever (luckily it doesn't seem to bother either of them too much and brady is making up for it in sleep) but really... how does life move so fast?!  i'm being to wonder if i'm losing it.  i honestly feel like i am.

anyways, this morning we went to the library and met up with friends.  heaven forbid should our day not include hanging out with elle.  we returned this stack of books to the library because we're either bored of them, they're weird (obesity appreciation, girl with divorces parents celebrating seder, y'know), or it's actually a dvd and our dvd player is broken.   

well, i got online tonight to check our book count and realized i had A MILLION AND ONE things that were due on the 10th.  colossal fail.  seriously, i swear i JUST renewed everything.  so now i have almost $10 in fines i need to pay off.  which brings my library fines total for the past 2 years up to maybe $15.  not bad considering we've probably checked out thousands of books (the nerd in me wishes there was a way to track those stats... but mostly a way to keep track of a comprehensive list of the books and movies we've checked out) and really, this is just a nice opportunity to give back and donate a few bucks to the library, right?  even if we paid $15 a month, it would still be worth it.  although i love that that's not necessary.  this is a fine i'm happy to pay.  but really... did the last seven days actually happen?  i am so weirded out right now i'm having trouble finding words for it.  obviously.

brady was so excited to get this ball, he crawled right out of his pants.  that's what happens when skinny babies army crawl on their belly.  abigail never army crawled so i'm just kind of wondering how long it will be until he starts using his knees.  don't think i don't try to teach him correct posture.  it doesn't work though.  the second i touch him, he collapses in a fit of giggles.  most ticklish kid ever.

things for my calling have been so busy lately.  it's just "lds exhausted cont." all the time.  last week we had conference weekend... all ten hours of it.  monday was family night... i can't even remember what we did.  tuesday night christopher had a presidency meeting.  wednesday night christopher met us at a park for family pictures and then i stopped by home for two seconds to drop off kids before i went to my presidency meeting.  thursday night my honey was out of town so i dropped off my kids with a friend while i went to the church for stake auxiliary training and didn't get them in bed until after 10.  friday night i left the kids at home with my honey for a few hours while i went to the church for young women volleyball.  and saturday i found myself waking up at 6am and being gone from 7 - 2 for the youth temple walk.  i totally thought things would be so much easier once the temple walk was done on saturday but that's not quite the case yet.  

monday night i spent about four hours doing training.  tuesday i started planning for our ward halloween party and we had young womens at the church that night.  this morning was great because i took the kids to the library and the park and i was a great mom because abigail got to play a ton with elle and brady got to eat woodchips but then i dragged them around the dollar store for something like two hours (while abigail ran around like she was on crack and shattered a glass snow globe with glitter water all over the floor within five minutes of being there... although thankfully brady slept part of it and was in an exhausted coma zombie sort of state even when he was awake) while i scoped out prizes and did all sorts of math.  it is really a shame i could never get anything but straight C's.  raise your hand if you hate math!  alwaysandforever.

but happy day, if that isn't perfectly staying within a $50 budget then i don't know what is.  sadly, i got home and went through everything for the girl who i'll be turning this over to (don't you love when you get to hand over stuff like this?!) and realized that none of the whistles work.  so now i gotta go back tomorrow and convince the cashier to take those back and let me have something else (dollar store doesn't do returns so i'm interested to see how this will play out) and get that all organized before i drop it off at the girl's house.

we just hope this girl appreciates my over the top organizing skills of all of these prizes and the games they go to and who is running the games in which rooms and who will be bringing the games, and on and on.  just kidding... i know she's grateful.  i'm pretty much wrapping this neatly with a bow and placing it right in her lap.  she actually offered to make me baked goods to help return the favor.  i assured her i'm only doing it for the intrinsic value.

 

 

i always feel so heavy like i have such a weight... and this week, tonight especially, i feel like i am personally amputating my own arms, and both of my legs as well... the weight is lifting and i'm getting lighter but at what cost?  it's painful, a surreal, and life changing in a way i can't yet wrap my head around.

so, the next few days are doing to be awesome.  equal parts busy and awesome.

thursday- wrap up my part in this halloween party planning and go on a doubled date to the avs game!  the avs are one of two teams that are undefeated right now so let's all cross our fingers and toes that they pull of another win for us tomorrow night!

friday- not sure yet what fun the morning will hold, but that night i'm going to time out for women.  this is a first for me and i'm pretty excited!

saturday- time out for women until later in the afternoon.  hopefully we can do something fun together as a family that night... i cherish that time with just the four of us.

sunday- i've got byc but then i won't even get to be in our ward (three weeks in a row since it was general conference and then the kids being sick and now this...) because we'll be in my in law's ward for mark's homecoming talk!  i'm so excited for this.  of all my brothers in law, mark is the one that feels most like an actual brother to me.  he reminds me of my own brother, we have a sibling feeling relationship, and he even has the same birthday as my brother... i love him to death.  and ever since he got back from mexico, he speaks english with an accent and spanish voice intonations... just like walter did when he got back from his spanish speaking mission in san francisco.  anyways... all day hillier family fun.

and then it will be monday again... and i love mondays.  life moves fast.  i feel like i'm trying not to blink and yet somehow i'm still missing it!  just gotta soak it up as best i can.

ps- something else inevitable?  i finally had the opportunity to be THAT parent.  tonight while my honey and i were talking, abigail locked herself and brady in the upstairs bathroom.  try as i might, my efforts to describe to her how to unlock the door were not at all working and i didn't really want to send my christopher spidermanning on our roof in the pitch black, especially since i knew that window to our bathroom was locked.  so after a few minutes of abigail telling me the door was broken, i went got a wire hanger from the downstairs hall closet (tender mercy that i hadn't thrown them all away like i had previously wanted to) and worked it in the door handle.  miracle of miracles it actually worked and opened the door almost instantly!  i am still shocked... i've never been able to successfully break in like that... using a bobby pin might as well be an urban legend or something hollywood made up... and it actually worked!  i am so grateful for this and not really allowing myself to think of what would have happened if that didn't work.  what are you supposed to do when your three year old and your baby are locked in a room?  call an after hours lock smith?  just kidding... is that a job for the fire department?!  seriously... i'm so curious about this.  it's not like we could break down the door since brady was riiiiight there.  close call.  i'm one step closer to experiencing every parent horror story i've ever heard.